Man masturbating in the kitchen
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I could masturbate anytime, anywhere!

By Nehaa Singh Khamboj Monday, December 28, 2015 - 11:50
Tarun was addicted to masturbation despite a great sex life. He would even do it in public spaces. Find out how he took control over his urges.

Tarun is 25-year-old animator from Hyderabad.

Self-love

I started masturbating at the age of 15 and would do it five or even six times a day. Anything remotely sexual would turn me on. A glimpse of cleavage, a girl in tight figure-hugging outfit or even the memory of an enticing picture would get me all hot and erect and I’d have to “relieve” myself. Time passed, but my desire to masturbate often, didn’t. When I finished college, I met Laila and I knew she was the one for me and by any standards our sex life was rocking!

But, I would still masturbate two or three times a day. Even an hour or two after we’d make love, there I was “pleasing” myself yet again. And my urges didn’t stop at home. At work, friends’ homes, restaurants, bars – you name it and I’d probably masturbated there. There were times when I didn’t feel right but I’d readily dismiss the thought. I thought after all “self-love” is always good!

Caught red-handed

One night Laila woke up to find me masturbating on the couch. Disturbed by what she saw she just went back to the bedroom. I stopped, washed up and went to her side of the bed. “Is the sex not good enough?” she asked. “Of course it is! I love it. But I have these uncontrollable urges and I just need to masturbate,” I said.

And just like that, I told her everything. From how many times to where all I masturbate to how easily I get turned on. “We all have urges but it can be tricky if we act on them all the time,” she said. I asked myself, “Was this just a habit that I couldn’t get rid of? I wasn’t unhappy with our sex life or stressed about anything so was this some added thrill?”

Honestly even until today I can’t pinpoint it to any one specific thing. When I had an erection I had to masturbate, for me it really boiled down that.

Understanding partner

Laila did right by pointing out that masturbating so often and particularly in public spaces could potentially be embarrassing and troublesome. What if I got caught with my pants down, literally? Plus I could sense she was hurt. I’d probably feel the same way if the tables were turned.

Laila said, “Tarun, don’t push to stop your urges if you don’t want to. It’s the worst thing you could do to yourself.” It finally dawned on me that I had the most understanding and supportive girl in the world. My dirty secret was out and I wanted to make a change.

Small steps

I took small steps like distracting myself when I felt an erection coming. I’d think about something else, get engrossed in work or listen to my favourite music. I’d find other activities that gave me pleasure like playing video games or going for a jog and if nothing worked then I’d masturbate.

Initially, it was tough to control the need to masturbate willy-nilly, but soon I was just doing it at home, maybe few times a week. I am more focused at work and my sex life with Laila went on to a whole new level of excitement and understanding. I couldn’t be happier.

First published 4 May 2015

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Comments
Relax bete! masturbation is a safe way to satisfy yourself. It would do no harm nor any illness. But there are many other activities such as sports, games Or hobbies.http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/men-masturbating
I often masturbate 3 or 4 times in day. I think I never try to find opposite sex partner perhaps due to SELF LOVE. I'm very pleased with my own personal love. I didn't masturbate in public places. One thing by which I always afraid.... Is... IS MASTURBATING SAFE...ANY DISODER.....OR ANYTHING...... Plz reply...
Relax bete! masturbation is a safe way to satisfy yourself. It would do no harm nor any illness. But there are many other activities such as sports, games Or hobbies.http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/men-masturbating
I often masturbate 3 or 4 times in day. Many time i used porn to make a good and short orgasm, but i want to leave this wrong habit. Please give me some easy and comfortable suggestion
Listen Ramanand bete! masturbation is a safe way to satisfy yourself. It would do no harm nor any illness. But there are many other activities such as sports, games Or hobbies. Clear your doubt and read this. http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/men-masturbating
Sunil bete, relax! Jaldi viryapaat hone se koi baat nahin, don’t worry. Toh sabse pehle toh apni partner ki body ko samjh lo- usko time de do. Aur yadi shareer mein uttejna adhik ho, sex ki bhavna zyada hogi toh sheegra hi patan hone ki sambhavna bhi adhik ho sakti hai. Aisi stithi mein, partner par focus badhana, foreplay, yaani bete ki pravesh karne se pehle bahut se alag alag kriyaen karna , jinse dono ko anand mile, apne partner ki uttejna badhana, yeh sab activities sabse zaroori hain. Iske ilava, partner ke saath sex karne se pehle, ek baar hast maithun kar saktey hain, utne samay pehle jitne mein ling mein tanaav aa jaaye. Condom ka istemaal bhi jaldi discharge kum karne mein madadgaar saabit ho sakta hai. https://lovematters.in/hi/news/premature-ejaculation-top-five-facts Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Hlo... Mam plz....help me mai 8 saal se master beat kar raha hu or mera penis ab achi trah se khada nhi hota hai or meri shadi ho rahi hai mai kya kru kha meri wife mujhse khus reh paayegi or mai life time tak khus reh paaungna or usko khus rakh paaunga
Hello, Sashi bete. Iske liye hastmaithun ko zimmedaar mat maaniye kyunki ek safe/surakshit tareeka hai apni santushti karne ka. Isse koi nuksaan ya beemari nahin hoti. Yadi chahein toh bahut see activities hain, jinmein aap samya bitaa sakte hain. Jaise ki khel – games, gym ya koi hobbies…ok? Yeh bhi padhiye: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/men-masturbating https://lovematters.in/hi/news/i-could-masturbate-anytime-anywhere https://lovematters.in/hi/making-love/sex-problems-how-to-overcome-them/are-my-sex-problems-caused-by-masturbation Please relax! Kahin aap kisi tension, pressure mein toh nahi hain na? Yeh samjh lijiye ki sex karne ke liye bilkul tanav mukt hona zaruri hai bête. Iss baare mein aur yaha padh lo : https://lovematters.in/hi/news/4-signs-you-have-erectile-dysfunction https://lovematters.in/hi/news/erection-trouble-where-turn Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Mujhe night folt 2days par roj hota rhta hai isse kya problem hota h ,aur viray bhi ptla hogya h, aur mera ling jldi khada utejit nhi hota h,ye kaise thik hoga
Rakesh bete, nightfall hona bahut common hain. Yeh koi bimaari nahi jiska ilaaj maujood ho, isse aapko koi nuksan nahi hoga so don't worry. Baaki aap yaha padh lo : https://lovematters.in/hi/term/wet-dreams https://lovematters.in/hi/news/wet-dreams-top-five-facts Bete virya ka gadha-mota hone se koi sambandh nahi hain. Zara yeh padho: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/ejaculation https://lovematters.in/hi/news/semen-top-five-facts https://lovematters.in/hi/news/watery-semen-dont-blame-masturbation Kahin aap kisi tension, pressure mein toh nahi hain na? Yeh samjh lijiye ki sex karne ke liye bilkul tanav mukt hona zaroori hai bête. Iss baare mein aur yaha padh lo : https://lovematters.in/hi/news/4-signs-you-have-erectile-dysfunction https://lovematters.in/hi/news/erection-trouble-where-turn Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
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