Man's hand grabbing sheet in orgasm
© Love Matters

His orgasms

When a man gets really turned on, he can have an orgasm – in other words, he can come, or climax.

When you’re aroused, your penis gets hard and erect. When you have an orgasm, your muscles contract and you ejaculate – a yellowish white liquid comes out of your penis. Men often discover orgasms themselves when they start masturbating.

When a man comes while having intercourse, he usually stops moving back and forth. At this point it’s usually too sensitive to move. After an orgasm the head of the penis, the glans, is usually very sensitive. If you touch it, it can be very uncomfortable. Women on the other hand often like it if the movement goes on for a little while after they’ve had an orgasm.

Sensitive spots

In fact your entire body is one big sensitive spot. But it feels particularly nice when certain parts of your body are touched – these are called erogenous zones. In boys it’s the penis and testicles, and in particular the head of the penis. But your neck, arms, chest and buttocks are also sensitive.

A man can get an erection at the most unexpected moments. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. And it’s also not a sign that it’s immediately time for sex.

Too fast?

Sometimes a man can reach orgasm too quickly during intercourse. This can be annoying, leaving the partner feeling disappointed and unsatisfied, and both of you feeling like it’s all over too soon. Here are some tips to delay reaching a climax:

  • take a short break
  • switch your attention to other parts of your body
  • think about something other than sex
  • withdraw your penis from the vagina for a little while
  • squeeze the base of your penis underneath with your fingers

Another orgasm?

A man can’t have another orgasm straight away. A woman can – around 10 to 15 seconds after an orgasm her clitoris is back in its normal state.

Keeping in step

Do you find that you come more quickly than your partner does? That’s perfectly normal. Among heterosexual couples, most men reach orgasm more quickly and easily than women do. A couple of tips to help keep in step with each other:

  • Take time to build up your lovemaking. And ask your partner what they like.
  • Put them at ease so they can let go and just enjoy you touching them without always caressing you too. Show them that you also find it really arousing to see them enjoying your caresses.

Simultaneous orgasms

Did you both have an orgasm at the same time? You’ve been lucky! Usually it’s not so easy to have a simultaneous orgasm. When you come, you’re usually thinking about yourself and not your partner. Don’t put too much pressure on it. If you manage to come at the same time it’s nice, but it’s also exciting to come one after the other. You can pay more attention to your partner and enjoy seeing him or her having an orgasm.


It’s nice to enjoy cuddling, caressing and talking after making love. In particular many girls find afterplay important.

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