Auntyji - Love Matters
Love Matters

My bf loves dirty talking – should I go along with it?

By Auntyji Tuesday, January 19, 2016 - 16:33
My bf loves dirty talk, but isn’t it wrong? I am not too comfortable with it. He does a lot for me and I don’t want to let him down. Please help! Nadia (23), Coimbatore.

Auntyji says… Boyfriend wants to get naughty Nadia and you are going, “Not me… Not me!” Hain, beta?

All boxes ticked

So beta, first toh I am very happy that he is a good man. I mean he does a lot for you. I am also happy that while you are not comfortable with this, you too want to make him happy. That’s a very positive approach to everything between you two – ok let’s just say it – I mean, !

Ab aayi baat ‘wrong’ ki. Nadia, you know what I always say – sex and everything around it has to be between consenting adults, it has to be consensual and safe. To be double sure, it must be totally negotiated.

That basically means you both know what you signed up for. Once you both tick off those boxes – and we know how hard that is – well then puttar, nothing ought to be dirty or wrong, should it? It’s a very intimate matter and it’s between you two – all boxes ticked!

Let me hear your body talk

Now why does he like dirty talking? Because he likes you, kuddiye! Sex talk or ‘dirty’ talk can make people feel aroused and passionate. If coming from you, or your partner, it’s a no-holds-barred sort of interaction. Let’s say like porn has entered the bedroom or kitchen or wherever it is that you are having sex at the moment.

It shows that you are as much a participant in the giving and receiving of satisfaction. It also shows a great degree of self confidence and yet is such a private thing between the two of you. It heightens the experience.

Actually, here it has a lot to do with him being verrrryyy turned on. Because you are a super sexy lady! It’s bare and it’s naked and it’s out of his own mouth. He said it, you heard it and it will ring in your ears when you are giving that business presentation the next afternoon. 

Agreements and negotiations

Hearing your partner mouth words, which are otherwise oh-my-God-so-TABOO, can be a shocker. It could leave you with a WHAT?!-where-did-that-come-from feeling. For some women, it can be read as demeaning,“Why did he say that to me? Does he think I am that type of a girl?” (By the way, what is that type?)

It can come as real bummer, which is why it has to be negotiated. Just like any other sex act. What may seem super sexy to him may make you feel a bit ‘eewwww’ the next morning. You see, just because someone agrees to kiss does not mean they are agreeing to the entire buffet of real and imagined sex acts. Oh no, make no mistake – negotiate.

Sex-pearen diaries

Puttar, sabse vaddi gal, only if you like it. Only if it does all-the-above for you too. If it freaks you out, makes you uncomfy or if you get tongue tied at the very idea, well that’s not going to make for very good sex anyway, is it? Don’t like it, stop him. Easy peasy. The more you invest in the act of sex, the more you get in return betajee, yaad rakhna yeh. What works wonders to spruce up the romp is also the surprise element, and this can be exactly that.

You may not be the Shakespeare of sex talk, but what you can begin with is to keep the ‘bad’, ‘dirty’, ‘wrong’ out of the lexicon of consensual love making. Pyaar ko pyaar hee rehne do, koi ilzaam na do betaaaa! Get ready Nadia, and get into the act, who knows, the very next thing you say, may just send him spinning into the sexmos!

To protect the author’s privacy, the person in the picture is a model.

Have you ever tried dirty talking with your partner? Share your experiences or concerns on our discussion board or Facebook.

Auntyji says… Boyfriend wants to get naughty Nadia and you are going, “Not me… Not me!” Hain, beta?

All boxes ticked

So beta, first toh I am very happy that he is a good man. I mean he does a lot for you. I am also happy that while you are not comfortable with this, you too want to make him happy. That’s a very positive approach to everything between you two – ok let’s just say it – I mean, !

Ab aayi baat ‘wrong’ ki. Nadia, you know what I always say – sex and everything around it has to be between consenting adults, it has to be consensual and safe. To be double sure, it must be totally negotiated.

That basically means you both know what you signed up for. Once you both tick off those boxes – and we know how hard that is – well then puttar, nothing ought to be dirty or wrong, should it? It’s a very intimate matter and it’s between you two – all boxes ticked!

Let me hear your body talk

Now why does he like dirty talking? Because he likes you, kuddiye! Sex talk or ‘dirty’ talk can make people feel aroused and passionate. If coming from you, or your partner, it’s a no-holds-barred sort of interaction. Let’s say like porn has entered the bedroom or kitchen or wherever it is that you are having sex at the moment.

It shows that you are as much a participant in the giving and receiving of satisfaction. It also shows a great degree of self confidence and yet is such a private thing between the two of you. It heightens the experience.

Actually, here it has a lot to do with him being verrrryyy turned on. Because you are a super sexy lady! It’s bare and it’s naked and it’s out of his own mouth. He said it, you heard it and it will ring in your ears when you are giving that business presentation the next afternoon. 

Agreements and negotiations

Hearing your partner mouth words, which are otherwise oh-my-God-so-TABOO, can be a shocker. It could leave you with a WHAT?!-where-did-that-come-from feeling. For some women, it can be read as demeaning,“Why did he say that to me? Does he think I am that type of a girl?” (By the way, what is that type?)

It can come as real bummer, which is why it has to be negotiated. Just like any other sex act. What may seem super sexy to him may make you feel a bit ‘eewwww’ the next morning. You see, just because someone agrees to kiss does not mean they are agreeing to the entire buffet of real and imagined sex acts. Oh no, make no mistake – negotiate.

Sex-pearen diaries

Puttar, sabse vaddi gal, only if you like it. Only if it does all-the-above for you too. If it freaks you out, makes you uncomfy or if you get tongue tied at the very idea, well that’s not going to make for very good sex anyway, is it? Don’t like it, stop him. Easy peasy. The more you invest in the act of sex, the more you get in return betajee, yaad rakhna yeh. What works wonders to spruce up the romp is also the surprise element, and this can be exactly that.

You may not be the Shakespeare of sex talk, but what you can begin with is to keep the ‘bad’, ‘dirty’, ‘wrong’ out of the lexicon of consensual love making. Pyaar ko pyaar hee rehne do, koi ilzaam na do betaaaa! Get ready Nadia, and get into the act, who knows, the very next thing you say, may just send him spinning into the sexmos!

To protect the author’s privacy, the person in the picture is a model.

Have you ever tried dirty talking with your partner? Share your experiences or concerns on our discussion board or Facebook.

Did you find this useful?

Comments
Bete iski wajah sex positions ka theek se na ho pana bhee ho sakta hai. Asie mein zaruri hai ki aap unka majjak banaye bina ya, alcohna kiye bina. Gym, exercise shuru karne ko kahein aur wajan par kabu karne ki salha dein jisse ki woh aage bhee anya bimariyoun se bach paeyin. Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/hi/forum
Aadesh beta, iske liye hastmaithun ko zimmedaar mat maaniye kyunki hastmaithun ek safe/surakshit tareeka hai apni santushti karne ka. Relax! Jaldi viryapaat hone se koi baat nahin, don’t worry. Toh sabse pehle toh apni partner ki body ko samjh lo- usko time de do. Aur yadi shareer mein uttejna adhik ho, sex ki bhavna zyada hogi toh sheegra hi patan hone ki sambhavna bhi adhik ho sakti hai. Aisi stithi mein, partner par focus badhana, foreplay, yaani bete ki pravesh karne se pehle bahut se alag alag kriyaen karna , jinse dono ko anand mile, apne partner ki uttejna badhana, yeh sab activities sabse zaroori hain. Iske ilava, partner ke saath sex karne se pehle, ek baar hast maithun kar saktey hain, utne samay pehle jitne mein ling mein tanaav aa jaaye. Condom ka istemaal bhi jaldi discharge kum karne mein madadgaar saabit ho sakta hai. https://lovematters.in/hi/news/premature-ejaculation-top-five-facts Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Meri wife Bahut moti hai, shadi ke 4shal ho gye O santust nahi hoti hai mujhse kahti hai Aapka chhota hai mujhe Pata nahi chalta hai. Kya karu pareshan Hu Upay bataiye
Aadesh kumar
Tue, 03/29/2016 - 00:29
Aunty ji main 4 year se hastmathun ker rha.hoo jisse main 1 minut me discharg ho jata hoon .koi upay btao sex time bdane ka
Bete SHIVAMm Sahi - Galat ka nirnay, sirf hum khud hee le saktey hain.,Aur koi nahin kar sakta humare liye . Apne se umar mein badi mahila ke saath sambadh ke bare mein bahut se log sochtey hain. Lekin apki is soch ke karan kahin aap kisi badi musibat mein na padd jaye isliye zara aap svyum chintan kar leejiye, aur soch leejiye. Jara yeh writup bhi padh lo : http://lovematters.in/hi/news/should-i-try-sex-older- woman
Beta jaldi hone se koi baat nahin, dont worry. So sabse pehle toh apni partner ki body ko samjh lo- usko time de do. Aur yadi shareer menin uttejna adhik hogi, sex ki bhavna zyada hogi toh sheeghr patan hone ki sambhavna bhi adhik hee hogee. aisee stithi mein, partner par focus badhana, foreplay , yaani bête ki pravesh karne se pehle bahut se alag alag kriyaein karna , jinse dono ko aanand mile, apne partner kee uttejna badhana, yeh sab activitys sabse zaroori hain. iske ilava, partner ke saath sex karne se pehle, ek baar hast maithun kar saktey hain, utne samay pehele jitne mein ling mein tanaav aa jaaye. Condom ka istemaal bhi jaldi discharge mein help karta hai. http://lovematters.in/hi/news/premature-ejaculation-top-five-facts
meri gf muje romence nhi krne deti or vo dusri id se mujhe uski frnd bol kr ye sb khti h k tum apni gf k sath romemce kro.me bot confuse hogya hu k kya kru kyuki me uske sath jabrdasti nhi kr cahta. soo aunty ji plss hlp me.
ajay prakash
Thu, 01/21/2016 - 00:36
aunty ji m bahut jaldi discharge ho jata hu jaise hi apne gf ki pussy me apni penis rkhta hu tabhi mera nikal jata h aur m sex nhi kr pata koi upaye btaye
Add new comment

Comment

  • Allowed HTML tags: <a href hreflang>