Same turn off and turn on
You and your girlfriend have a pretty good sex life. Just about every time you get it on, you both get off, so to speak. You feel you have the same turn-ons - and turn-offs - when it comes to sex, so you’d say the two of you are sexually compatible. But does your girlfriend feel the same way? And is this even important to your relationship and sex life?
A group of researchers from the US and Canada got to wondering about this very subject and decided to do something about it. The researchers first tracked down over 100 young couples. They asked each partner questions about their sexual likes and dislikes and turn-ons and turn-offs. That way they could measure whether the lovebirds were actually sexually compatible.
They also asked the participants whether they felt they were into the same things as their partner. Does actual or felt sexual compatibility what really matters when it comes to a satisfying relationship and sex life, the researchers wanted to know.
Yay to sexual satisfaction
Feeling you’re on the same page as your partner sexually (more so than actually being into the same things) has a major effect on whether you’re happy with him or her and satisfied with your sex life, the results showed.
So what does this mean exactly? How can you feel you and your partner are on the same page if you aren’t? And why is it so important for both a good sex life and a happy relationship?
For starters, it’s possible that you and your girlfriend have different specific turn-ons. Say you get aroused at the very thought of her naked while, let’s be honest, seeing you in your birthday suit doesn’t exactly do the trick for her. But if you both consistently climax during sex you’ll obviously feel that you’ve got some important stuff in common.
Feeling of intimacy
Feeling that you and your partner are into the same things could be a sign of intimacy in a relationship, say the researchers. That could explain why simply believing you’re sexually compatible is linked to feeling satisfied with your sweetheart.
Reference: The impact of sexual compatibility on sexual and relationship satisfaction in a sample of young adult heterosexual couples. Sexual and Relationship Therapy. March, 2013
*The persons in the picture are models.