Female orgasm
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Sex or masturbation – how do girls get an orgasm?

Love Matters asked women what worked better for their pleasure meter – masturbation or sex with a partner. Here’s what they had to say.

Grass is greener there

I masturbate. Through it, I orgasm sometimes and at other times, I don’t. I haven’t experienced sex with a partner yet. From what I gather about sex through others’ experiences, I feel it’s obviously better than masturbation. 

*Lipika, 24, civil-services aspirant

Coupled only

I don’t really masturbate, not explored it much. I tried but realised it wasn’t really my thing. Also, I’ve been in a relationship since I was very young age, so I didn’t feel the need for masturbation

I’ve experienced sex with my boyfriend and have orgasmed, obviously.

*Ramona, 21, student

Who knows

I haven’t tried masturbation or sex. I have a partner and we keep talking about trying sex sometime. From what I hear about both these options, I feel sex with a partner is obviously better. 

*Abhivyakti, 19, student

Who needs a partner 

Masturbation? No. I don’t have time for such things. Majority of my friends who masturbate enjoy it quite a lot, though, and after masturbating don’t feel the need for a partner! I can’t say about masturbation for myself, though. I had kissed and made out with my previous boyfriend and I had climaxed through that.

*Minisha, 25, research analyst

No idea

I don’t masturbate because I have a husband. I am married. I’ve experienced sex, yes.

(Do you orgasm through sex with your partner?) *pause* I have no idea. (laughs and walks away)

*Suneeta, 28, hostess at restaurant

The feelings

I haven’t masturbated, nor had sex with anyone yet. From experiences of women around, I felt sex will be more pleasurable because there are more feelings involved there. Khud sey khud ka is not that much fun, I feel. 

*Manisha, 18, student

Fingering it out

I’ve tried masturbating but I’m not sure how it is done. However, I did manage to hit some spots that gave pleasure. In fact, I tried masturbation only after exploring sexually with my partner, he helped me figure myself there. 

I’ve just started with sexual life and hence, I haven’t explored much yet. I run away before reaching orgasm fearing I might squirt or something. Masturbation has never been very satisfying. Sex and fingering (by partner) have been.

*Shivali, 26, social worker

Self-service is best

I discovered masturbation quite late in life – in my early 20s -- and the process of figuring out what works for me was as gradual as it can get. But it’s been my best self-discovery. I have far and few sexual interactions and I always find myself comparing the quality of pleasure from sex to what I get from masturbation, which is so much better. 

No partner has ever made me orgasm and I always orgasm when I masturbate. 

*Reshma, 27, graphic designer

Porn and masturbation 

I often masturbate while watching porn. I know maybe I am one of the few women who love watching porn and masturbating because from what I know, most men do so. I also ask my partner to watch porn with me so that we both can masturbate each other and get off. It’s the most wonderful orgasm that I get when I masturbate. Having sex does not give me orgasm. It never did. 

*Nitika, 29, content writer 

My girl is the best

I am a bisexual and now in a committed relationship with a girl. I must say that I orgasm with her much easily while making out as compared to my ex-boyfriend. She knows exactly what spots to hit and how to touch my clit. Orgasm with her is so much better that I do not indulge in masturbation much now. 

*Gauri, 26, call centre executive 

Want to know various ways how you can make love to a woman? Watch out the video below: 

Ways to make love to her


*To protect the identity, names have been changed and the person/s in the picture is/are models.

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Meri ek mahila dost hai hamlog 5 Sal se phone sex krte hain dono ko santushti miljati hai par usko phone par l d chushna jiyada pasand hai to kiya ham phone par usse wahi krayen
Bete phone sex ke baare mein adhik jaankari ke liye ise padhiye: https://lovematters.in/en/making-love/ways-to-make-love/top-10-tips-for-hot-phone-sex Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
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