how i bought my first condom
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When I bought my first condom

‘The staff had probably never had a woman ask for one’, Akriti tells Love Matters of her first time buying condoms at a store. The real problem though was explaining them about lubricants, she chuckles!

*Akriti, 25, is a media professional in Mumbai.

Come home

Himanshu and I had been talking about how hard it was to find compatible romantic partners, and I lamented that I had not yet even experienced myself sexually with another person.

‘Then come home’, he said, and I laughed hard. He laughed too. We both knew he meant it.

My pulse raced at the thought. We’d been friends for two years in a completely platonic way and now we were talking sex.

Himanshu was sexually active for nearly a decade but it would have been my first time for intercourse. I was nearly into my mid-20s.

I had been holding on to the idea of doing it with a special someone but had often desired him in my heart. We walked to the train station and took different trains to reach our homes.

The d-day

We both lived with our families, so, there was no space to put our idea into reality for a while. But, we started to express our desires over texts and almost had our act planned to the T.

A whole winter passed texting and waiting. One night in March, he told me that his family was going to be away the next day. So we decided, it was time!  I chatted with him on WhatsApp that night.

‘I know intercourse might be uncomfortable for you, given the first time’, he said, ‘but there are ways of easing it like I could buy some lubricant.’  

It was such a sexy thought and I felt good because he cared for my comfort.

We both took leave from work the next day and I travelled one hour to be at his place early the next morning.

What if?

Just five minutes before reaching his house, nervousness gripped me: what if he does not have a condom? What if I get pregnant?

I got off the auto rickshaw, stopped by at the medical store and stepped into the store to buy a pack of condoms and a bottle of lubricant. This was my first time doing this and dealing with all-male sales-staff was quite an experience.

Condoms were easier to pick once they were past the awkwardness of saying and hearing the word from a woman’s mouth. Explaining that I wanted a lubricant that’s used in sexual acts was the real struggle.

I finally had to name the brand of a condom company that also made lubricants, and that’s how they understood what I wanted. I stepped out the store with a sense of relief.

The rest of the way I felt as if I was carrying ammunition in my bag. I felt every eye was on me as if my bag was transparent and they could all see I was on my way to have sex! I hurried to his house.

Doubly prepared

We sat around for a whole chatting non-sexual things. Then, he put on the TV for some music and faced me while on his knees.

‘Should we break the ice now?’

His lips on mine felt like a part of me. I loved his touches. We moved to his bedroom from the living room. I unbuttoned and removed his shirt. He took off my top and unhooked my bra. Soon, we were naked. I had never been naked with anyone before.

We continued feeling each other while on the bed. After fifteen minutes, he asked, ‘should I enter you?’

As he reached out to the bedside table for a condom, I offered him the condom from my jeans pocket, and he laughed hard: ‘You thought I’d be so under-prepared?’

‘What’s the harm in being doubly prepared?’ I replied, smiling. We made love twice before falling asleep on his bed.

I woke up with a smile. My first time was a special one, not because I had waited for a special someone. But because I had felt so much at ease and so in charge of my very first sexual experience.

*To protect the identity, names have been changed and the person/s in the picture is/are models.

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