Auntyji says, ‘Ahaa puttar, first let's get our position clear on this matter!’
Few good men
So beta the good news is you are devoted to orgasms – for your wife too! Wonderful. Not too many of you out there. It’s just great to be available for your partner in every way and sexually more so. I am sure you must have by now looked up for information on sexual positions and even tried a few.
But alas! I wish having good sex was as ‘text book’ as it is made out to be! It’s a very simple case of ‘if you don’t succeed once – try again.’ So I will not bore you with what you already know. For that your websites zindabad! What actually is crucial is the skill – the style, dear, not the size!
Play it right
Firstly, treat her right. Not only when you are going to jump into bed – but from the time you jump out of bed in the morning. Be nice, talk a bit, help out a bit. Not just on ‘Sex Day’, every day. Win her over in small ways – that when she suddenly thinks of you at work – she smiles secretively and tells her pals, ‘this Armaan na....ek dum paagal, he is’. This, my man, is the beginning of foreplay – already! Believe it or not! Sex is already on her mind.
The beginning and the end
Then is foreplay. Now bro, foreplay is not what comes in the beginning pages of a book beta. Woh foreword hota hai. Foreplay is not an edit job, it’s pretty much the entire story. Build on it. Ask her, show her. Suggest, request and keep her comfort in mind. It roughly translates into consent. If she says no, that’s final . Foreplay is a man’s best friend. Work it up for her and you will reap the benefits – equally! Double the fun, right?
Don’t push your own agenda
Being aggressive or blackmail or even cajoling – is out of bounds. Any new acts – new techniques and positions, ask before the act, beta. ‘Baby, I want to try woman on top – please let me show you over an evening cup of coffee’ is super sexy. But the same thing during the act may be heard as an order she may not understand and before you know it – the mood is gone in trying to master the technique! Negotiation my dear, is key.
Achha now there are a few body parts. The vulva is not a car – that’s a Volvo. The G spot is not an area close to Hazratganj Baag – its a teeny body part that is supposed to give more pleasure. The clitoris is not a creature like a tortoise – it’s your ticket to the pleasure land. Find these body parts, Columbus! Not during the journey – well before it!
Don’t be down there with your flashlight in one hand and a website page open in the other. AND, please – don’t go and settle ‘down under’! Move up –discover parts of her body she loves to be loved in and let me assure you – there are plenty – all above her navel.
Pyaar Lo – Pyaar Do!
Beta our partner is the only other human being who will be as physically close and intimate with you apart from your own self. Right? Toh phir kis liye sharmana? Ensure the partner does not get freaked out –feel shame or fear about anything.
Talk, discuss, explain – show her reliable literature or websites. Let her find her comfort zone too and then again talk about sex, love, pleasure. Girls can talk sex too you know – encourage her, with no shame, no judgement and with total consent and comfort! Love Matters wishes you both, years of respectful delightful sex.
*The person in the picture is a model.