Should I try sex with an older woman?

Auntyji says… Sanjay puttar, I hope Bangalore mein sab khairiyat hai? Betaji, there is absolutely nothing wrong with getting turned on by older women or being in a consensual relationship with them. I completely approve as long as both the people involved are happy about it. But that does not seem to be the case here.

See Sanjay, from what I understand you are not really attracted to anyone older than you. But just because your friends have been telling you, you feel you should try the experience.

Not comfortable

Betaji, personally I would never do anything just because my friends wanted me to do it. If you said you were attracted to an older woman and wanted to have a fling with her, I would have said ‘why not?’

I have a very simple funda in life: always do things that make you happy, as long as they don't hurt anyone else. And from what I understand you are not very keen on having sex with an older woman yourself. So I don’t see the reason why would you do anything that you are not comfortable with.

Stereotype

And as far as your friends’ logic about learning from an older woman’s experience is concerned, I would say it is just another overrated stereotype. After Savita Bhabhi happened, I think quite a lot of you young folks started noticing women out of your usual age group. I know that older women are expected to be more experienced and hence experts in carnal matters.

Now this is a stereotype and one doesn't necessarily have to go by it.So very often the expectation is that older ladies will be able to act as 'worldly' wise teachers to 'guide' younger men into the fine arts of sexual pleasures. If you believe that story, then be prepared to get disappointed. Kama Sutra wasn't mandatory reading for earlier generations either. That said, as a feminist I am happy to note that the women in their 30s have many more options now.

Learning

So Sanjay puttar, clearly age doesn't matter – but how you treat your partner is the key factor in any relationship. Most important thing is that you don’t force yourself on anyone and also don't participate in any sexual activity that you are not comfortable with.As far as learning is concerned, I say that we all learn from each other all the time.

Whether young or old, if you enjoy being with your partner, it will definitely be an enriching experience. But personally I would not get involved sexually just with an agenda of learning from the other person. I personally don’t even think it will even very useful.

This article was first published on 15/01/2013. 

To protect the identity, the person in the picture is a model and names have been changed. 

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