Anal sex

Guide to first time anal sex

Curious to try anal sex but not sure how to go ahead? Let Love Matters help you with a step-by-step guide to safe and enjoyable anal sex for the first time.
  1. Be sure
    If you have never tried anal sex, it can be an intimidating prospect. Understand that it’s ultimately your decision to go ahead or not. If you don’t feel ready for it, communicate your feelings to your partner. If they really love you, they will understand your choice.

    On the other hand, if your partner isn't ready for anal sex, talk to them. Forcing your partner will only add stress to the relationship. Find out why they are reluctant and give them time to come to terms with the idea. If they aren’t comfortable with anal sex, try other ways of making love. Sex, of any kind, is only pleasurable when both partners agree to it.
  2. Prepare yourself
    If and when you decide to go ahead and give it a try, prepare yourself well. Anal sex isn’t very painful, if performed with care. The muscle surrounding your anus is tight and that can be discomforting for the first time. Relaxing the muscle will reduce the discomfort. So relax and enjoy your first time. Talk to your partner about going slow and take one step at a time.
  3. Know myths from facts
    Several myths cloud our perception about anal sex. Some of these myths have cultural roots while others are purely misconceptions. Anal sex isn’t just for homosexuals, neither is it “dirty”.

    Find out more about anal sex myths.
  4. Be clean and safe
    Anus is a region highly susceptible to infection. You should always wash yourself before anal sex. Don't use too much soap around as it makes the area dry and can also lead to infections. Also, make sure that your bowel is empty for comfortable penetration. And always use a condom
  5. Always start with foreplay
    The anus doesn't self-lubricate. It is important you start with foreplay so that the receptive partner is excited and prepared for the act. Building anticipation will only help you to relax and enjoy anal sex.
  6. Don't penetrate immediately
    It is possible that your partner is not ready for penetration right away. Start stretching the muscle by inserting a finger first. See if your partner is aroused by this. Once comfortable, try multiple fingers, butt plugs or a vibrator. If and only when your partner finds this enjoyable, go ahead with penetration. Inserting the tip of your penis for the first few times will be difficult as the tip is the widest part. Don't lay flat on your stomach, the pressure might cause a tear around anus, use different positions instead.

    Read out more about sex positions
  7. Use lubricants
    Lubrication reduces friction, making anal sex more enjoyable and less painful. Choose silicone-based lubricants. Wash yourself well after you’re done to avoid infections. Using unclean sex toys or penis may lead to infections. Always remember to keep it healthy and safe!

Do you have any more tips to make anal sex less painful and more enjoyable? Leave a comment below or share your ideas via Facebook. You can also head to our discussion forum for a quick response.

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