how to have sex for the first time
© Love Matters | Rita Lino

First time sex: do's and don'ts

Thinking of having sex for the first time? It’s normal to be nervous. All first-timers face the same kind of anxiety. We’d like your first time to be pleasant and memorable, so here are our top tips to help you overcome some of your nerves.

Do…

  • Be comfortable
    Your first time having intercourse should be with someone you trust and like or love. You shouldn’t have sex under any kind of pressure – whether it’s from your partner or your peers. You should make this choice by yourself and feel comfortable with it.

    Once you’re sure about wanting to lose your virginity, you can think of a comfortable place and time to do it. It should be somewhere both of you can have enough time before and after sex – a place where you won’t be disturbed.

  • Build up slowly
    Take your time to relax and be comfortable around each other. Sex is not just about penetration. Foreplay is an essential part of sex. Kiss, caress, hug and touch each other in ways you enjoy – if you need inspiration, read here about the many ways to make love. Do everything you can to turn each other on.

    If you’re a woman about to lose your virginity, you’re probably worried that sex will be painful. But it doesn’t have to be if you’re well-lubricated. Of course women become wet naturally when they are aroused, so it’s important to take the time to get really turned on before he puts his penis in your vagina. A water-based lubricant can also make the process easier.

  • Pay attention to your partner
    It’s vital to communicate during sex. You can do so by talking to each other sensually or by making gestures or with eye contact. The key is to always be aware of your partner’s feelings. This way you will know whether your partner enjoys what you’re doing or not. 

  • Say ‘no’ if you’ve changed your mind
    While you’re in bed with your partner, you might want change your mind about going all the way. If you do, feel brave enough to speak up. You have every right to say no at any time. If your partner truly cares for and loves you, he or she will stand by your choice and give you as much time as you need to be OK with losing your virginity. 

    Know more about making love by watching our animated video here...

Don’t…

  • Forget contraception
    Use a condom and preferably another form of birth control. While condoms protect you against sexually transmitted diseases, the contraceptive will safeguard you against pregnancy in case the condom rips or slips. 

  • Do it if you’re too drunk
    While a little bit of alcohol can help you break the ice and start a conversation, too much of it can impair your judgment. You might regret your actions the next morning. Being drunk could also carry other risks such as forgetting to use condoms or contraceptives. Read more in our sex and alcohol top five facts.

  • Have very high expectations
    Don’t assume that first-time sex will be earth-shattering. Most likely, it won’t. Sex gets better as you get to know a person over time and build a lasting relationship with them. So if first-time sex doesn’t end up being as exciting as you imagined it to be, don’t fret. This is just the beginning! 

Here are a few more first time sex tips before you go ahead. Try to stay relaxed and focus on enjoying the moment. We wish you a good time!

Have you got some advice to add to the list? Leave your suggestion here or on Facebook.

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Comments
Aap jo bhi kar rahy hain wo safe hona cahhiey yaani safe sex yaha padh lo http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/safe-sex aur waise toh koi samsya nahi hain, haan yadi unkay patii aur aapkay bhaai ko aur baaki logo ko jab aapkay sambandh ke baarey mein pata chaljaeyga toh zarurr samsya aa sakti hai.
sunny rai
Sun, 12/21/2014 - 13:07
aunti ji mai apni girlfrnd k sath sex krna chahta hu...aur wo v mujhe bhut force krti h ki mere sath sex kro..pr mai hi mana kr deta hu..pr ab sex krne ka bhut man kr rha h..mujhe bs aap aisa koi behatrini tarika bta dijiye jis se ki mujhe aur use bhut hi aanans aaye..meri uamr 20 saal h aur meri gf ki umar 18 saal
chkshu(chnged)
Sun, 12/28/2014 - 01:32
Thnq to give favrable guideline. Today a day sex related problms are becom a big worry for teens n here ur hand hlps those thnks again bcs smtimes when i wnt sugestions the shit x stories arived n i got confused thnks to become a hlping hnd
Aisa bilkul bhi nischit nahi hai kyunki - Kaumarya ka poora daromadaar hymen ya jhilli se juda hua hai. Yaad rakhiye ki yeh bahut hee asani se toot saktee hai. apne doubts clear karo: http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/faqs-hymen-and-virginity
It is very common bete! Koi jaldi nahi hai! apana pura time lo har baat ko achhe se samjho! Mentally, physically, aur emotionally bhi. Is website pe bahut see jaan kari de gayee hai use padh lo… aur us vyakti ka intezaar karo jo ki aapke is darr ko samjhe bhi aur mitane mein bhi madad kare. Hum humeshan yahan hai aapke liye.
Bete Kuch mat kijiey aur sahi sammaey aaney ka intzaar kijiey jab wo khud sehmati dikhaey sex ke liey.Kyunki kisi bhi rishtey mey jabardasti acceptable nahi hai . in baton se dhyan hatiey aur apney rishtey ko aur majbut banaiey. http://lovematters.in/en/news/how-can-i-convince-her-have-sex
Yes yoni bahut choti hoti hai aur lacheele bhi. So Jald baazi mat keejiye, phele finger se try keejiye, koi lubrication use keejye… Lekin apki partner ko bahut hee relaxed rehana hai aur apko bhi is dauran bahut hee support karna hai. Poora ling ek hee baar andar jaaye yeh bilkul zaroori nahin, aur na hee iski rai dee jaati hai. iske barre mein yeh padhiye http://lovematters.in/hi/news/first-time-sex-top-five-facts Yadi sex dono pyaar ke saathiyoun ke beech ho, surakshit yaani bina koi zore zabardasti ke ho, so bahut hee achcha.
Auntiji me mere gf ke satth sex karna chata hun..lekin abhitak najot dard hota aisa suna toh fir kya karu ki mere gf ko sard na hoi or muze sex karna hain..
Bete Siddhesh! yoni bahut choti hoti hai aur lacheele bhi. So Jald baazi mat keejiye, phele finger se try keejiye, koi lubrication use keejye… Lekin apki partner ko bahut hee relaxed rehana hai aur apko bhi is dauran bahut hee support karna hai. Poora ling ek hee baar andar jaaye yeh bilkul zaroori nahin, aur na hee iski rai dee jaati hai. iske barre mein yeh padhiye http://lovematters.in/hi/news/first-time-sex-top-five-facts Yadi sex dono pyaar ke saathiyoun ke beech ho, surakshit yaani bina koi zore zabardasti ke ho, so bahut hee achcha.
Shubham Akash
Thu, 10/15/2015 - 21:30
Meri age 18 aur gf ki 17 h,hmlogo ne protective sex krn ka decision liya h,but bht darr lag rha h..jyada dard to nhi hoga first time..condom use karne se dard nhi hoga kya..pls help me
Hmmm! Sorry for delay bete! Lekin sabse pehle aap yeh samjh lijiye ki 18 saal se kam umar ki mahila ke saath kiya gaya sex chahein woh uski marzi se hee kyun na kiya gaya ho RAPE ki category mein aata hai. Isliye aisi baton ka vichar karne wale viyakti ko netik-anetik baton ka vichar karna chahiye. Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Ummm! Dekho bete bina condom ke sex karna apne aap mein ek safe idea bilkul bhee nahi hai. Isse anchahe garbh ke saath kai youn rog hone kaa bhi khatra ho sakta hai. http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/safe-sex Lekin haan Yadi jis viykati ke saath aap unsafe sex kar rahe hain use HIV hai toh HIV hone ki sambhavna hai. Duniya bhar mein sabse adhik HIV casess, sex ke zariye hue hain.Lekin HIV aur bhi kai asurakshit karano se hota hai.So! Zara detail mein yeh niche diya hua link padhiye: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/hiv
Bête Pehli baar sex kartaye samaye kya karna hai kya nahi karna hai, aur first sex ko kese theek tarah se kiya jaye is bare mein aap yaha detail mein padh lijieye : http://lovematters.in/hi/news/first-time-sex-top-five-facts Saath hi sex activity mein alag-alag tariko ka istemal kartay huay isse kese aur majjaydaar banana hai is baaray mein yaha padhein: http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/ways-make-love http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/making-love
Main aur meri gf sex karna chahte hain but foreplay ke dauran pura wetty hone baad v usko dard hota hai esliye abhi tak sex ka maza nhi le paye hain hmlog koi suggestion dijiye
Hmmmm! Ho sakta hai unhe koi darr ho ya doubt, yeh bhi ki who pregnancy se darti hon ya society se? Jo bhi ho shayed who abhi tayyar nahin, pehele yeh sab baatein clear karo aur phir sex ki planning. Sirf ek person ready hai aur doosre nahin, so phir toh koi maza nahin na? Aap samjh rahe hain na mera matlab? isliye make sure ki apki partner in sab cheezon ke liye tayyar hui hain. zara yeh padhiye: http://lovematters.in/hi/news/first-time-sex-top-five-facts https://lovematters.in/hi/news/how-can-i-please-my-wife-bed
ऋत्विक स रा अ
Mon, 06/20/2016 - 16:21
आंटी आंटी में पिछले साल मेरी गिरलफ्रेंड के साथ था सर्दियो का टाइम था हमने सेक्स करने का सोचा सेक्स से पहले मेने फॉरप्ले करना उचित समझा यह मेरा पहला समय था जब में सेक्स कर रहा था फॉरप्ले शुरू करने के 2 मिनट बाद मेरा शरीर काम्पने लगा सर से लेकर एडी तक पूरा शरीर कम्प रहा था मेने फॉरप्ले जारी रखा पर जब मेरी गिरलफ्रेंड ने अंदर डालने को बोला तो मेरे लिंग में कोई तनाव नही आ रहा था मेने लाख कोशिस की तनाव नही आया जिंदगी में पहली बार मुझे इतनी शर्मिंदगी महसूस कभी नही हुई थी क्या इसकी वजह मेरा पिछले 4 5 सालो से हस्थमैथुन करना है मेने शर्म के मारे किसी को नही बताया पर आपका पेज देखकर एक उम्मीद जगी है कृपया कोई उपाय बताइये क्या मुझे कोइस्मस्या है क्या मेरे कभी बचे पैदा नही होंगे आपका आभारी रहूंगा ऋत्विक फ्रॉम अमेरिका
बेटे ऋत्विक सबसे पहले शांत हो जाओ इसका कारण हस्थ्मेथुन नहीं है इसका कारण चिंता घबराहट हो सकती है लिंग में तनाव का कारण किसी किस्म का तनाव हो सकता है, कहीं आप किसी टेंशन , प्रेशर में तो नही हैं ? सेक्स के लिए बिल्कुल तनाव मुक्त होना ज़रूरी है. जिस बारे में और यहा पढ़ लीजिये: https://lovematters.in/hi/news/4-signs-you-have-erectile-dysfunction https://lovematters.in/hi/news/erection-trouble-where-turn यदि इस मुद्दे पर आप और गहरी चर्चा में जुड़ना चाहते हैं, तोह हमारे डिस्कशन बोर्ड, " जस्ट पूछो" में ज़रूर शामिल हों. https://lovematters.in/hi/forum
Bete ayan Pehli baar sex kartaye samaye kya karna hai kya nahi karna hai, aur first sex ko kese theek tarah se kiya jaye is bare mein aap yaha detail mein padh lijieye : https://lovematters.in/hi/news/first-time-sex-top-five-facts Saath hi sex activity mein alag-alag tariko ka istemal kartay huay isse kese aur majjaydaar banana hai is baaray mein yaha padhein: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/ways-make-love https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/making-love https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xbkAc_X2bCE&feature=youtu.be&app=desktop Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/hi/forum
Bête Pehli baar sex kartaye samaye kya karna hai kya nahi karna hai, aur first sex ko kese theek tarah se kiya jaye is bare mein aap yaha detail mein padh lijieye: https://lovematters.in/hi/news/first-time-sex-top-five-facts https://lovematters.in/hi/making-love/virginity/first-time-sex Saath hi sex activity mein alag-alag tariko ka istemal kartay huay isse kese aur majjaydaar banana hai is baaray mein yaha padhein: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/ways-make-love https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/making-love Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Muskan bete safe sex ke liye condom ka istemaal anivarya roop se karna chahiye, isse unchahe garv ke saath saath kai youn rogon se bhee bacha ja sakta hai. https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/safe-sex https://lovematters.in/hi/safe-sex/sti-prevention/safe-or-unsafe https://lovematters.in/hi/birth-control/we-had-sex-without-condoms-help Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Agar Maine kisi ladki k saath sex Kia and usse bleeding huyi and main agar uss blood ko. Galti se suck kr lia toh uss blood ki wajah se kuch dikkat toh nhi aayegi na mujhe ya aage jaakr kuch problem
Jee nahi Raj bete aise toh koi problem nahi hai- lekin hygiene ki drishti yeh swasth nahi mana jata hai. Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
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