how to have sex for the first time
© Love Matters | Rita Lino

First time sex: do's and don'ts

Thinking of having sex for the first time? It’s normal to be nervous. All first-timers face the same kind of anxiety. We’d like your first time to be pleasant and memorable, so here are our top tips to help you overcome some of your nerves.


  • Be comfortable
    Your first time having intercourse should be with someone you trust and like or love. You shouldn’t have sex under any kind of pressure – whether it’s from your partner or your peers. You should make this choice by yourself and feel comfortable with it.

    Once you’re sure about wanting to lose your virginity, you can think of a comfortable place and time to do it. It should be somewhere both of you can have enough time before and after sex – a place where you won’t be disturbed.

  • Build up slowly
    Take your time to relax and be comfortable around each other. Sex is not just about penetration. Foreplay is an essential part of sex. Kiss, caress, hug and touch each other in ways you enjoy – if you need inspiration, read here about the many ways to make love. Do everything you can to turn each other on.

    If you’re a woman about to lose your virginity, you’re probably worried that sex will be painful. But it doesn’t have to be if you’re well-lubricated. Of course women become wet naturally when they are aroused, so it’s important to take the time to get really turned on before he puts his penis in your vagina. A water-based lubricant can also make the process easier.

  • Pay attention to your partner
    It’s vital to communicate during sex. You can do so by talking to each other sensually or by making gestures or with eye contact. The key is to always be aware of your partner’s feelings. This way you will know whether your partner enjoys what you’re doing or not. 

  • Say ‘no’ if you’ve changed your mind
    While you’re in bed with your partner, you might want change your mind about going all the way. If you do, feel brave enough to speak up. You have every right to say no at any time. If your partner truly cares for and loves you, he or she will stand by your choice and give you as much time as you need to be OK with losing your virginity. 

    Know more about making love by watching our animated video here...


  • Forget contraception
    Use a condom and preferably another form of birth control. While condoms protect you against sexually transmitted diseases, the contraceptive will safeguard you against pregnancy in case the condom rips or slips. 

  • Do it if you’re too drunk
    While a little bit of alcohol can help you break the ice and start a conversation, too much of it can impair your judgment. You might regret your actions the next morning. Being drunk could also carry other risks such as forgetting to use condoms or contraceptives. Read more in our sex and alcohol top five facts.

  • Have very high expectations
    Don’t assume that first-time sex will be earth-shattering. Most likely, it won’t. Sex gets better as you get to know a person over time and build a lasting relationship with them. So if first-time sex doesn’t end up being as exciting as you imagined it to be, don’t fret. This is just the beginning! 

Here are a few more first time sex tips before you go ahead. Try to stay relaxed and focus on enjoying the moment. We wish you a good time!

Have you got some advice to add to the list? Leave your suggestion here or on Facebook.

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Beta jaldi ho ne se koi baat nahi, dont worry. So sabse pehle toh apni partner ki body ko samjh lijiye- unko time dijiye. Aur yadi shareer menin uttejna adhik hogi, sex ki bhavna zyada hogi toh shighrpatan hone ki sambhavna bhi adhik ho sakti hai. Aisee stithi mein, partner par focus badhana, foreplay , pravesh karne se pehle bahut se alag alag kriyaein karna , jinse dono ko aanand mile, apne partner kee uttejna badhana, yeh sab activities sabse zaroori hain. Iske ilava, partner ke saath sex karne se pehle, ek baar hastmaithun kar saktey hain, utne samay pehele jitne mein ling mein tanaav aa jaaye. Condom ka istemaal bhi jaldi discharge kum karne mein madadgaar saabit ho sakta hai. Yaha padhiye: Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho!
Beta sabse pahli baat ki aapki age abhi 16 saal hai - toh kyun na pahle thoda study, career banane ya life ko independant banane par focus kijiye, sex to usually aapki life me sahi samay par aa hi jayega, hai na?? Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna   chahte hain to hamare Facebook aur Instagram mein zarur shamil ho:
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