What to do if your partner blackmails you
Shutterstock/arda savasciogullari

What to do if your partner blackmails you

‘Change the way you dress up or I will break-up with you’. ‘Call me or I will reveal your sex chats to everyone’. ‘Have sex with me or I will put your nudes online’. If you have been in a similar situation, being blackmailed in a relationship, here is what you can do.
  1. First of all, know that it’s not your fault that you are being blackmailed by your partner. You did not do anything wrong in the relationship and your partner him(/ her) self is responsible for their blackmailing tendencies.

 

  1. The response to being blackmailed could vary from calling it out to your partner or reaching out to a friend or confidante for advice on how to act.

 

  1. In situations where it is possible, distancing yourself and cutting off contact from the partner who is blackmailing you could be a response. Though, it is understandable that it might not be feasible to do this in every situation because it involves two partners and a relationship of emotional involvement.

 

  1. If you are unable to call out the blackmail for what it is as you are confused, reaching out to a trusted colleague, relative or friend or even a therapist or professional counsellor (where financially possible) could be another course of action.

 

  1. Try not to be afraid and think through your course of action. Blackmailing is a crime in India and you must take legal help, if required. If you are a man, call the police at 100 to seek help. If you are a woman, you can call at Women’s Helpline number - 1091 so that they can also initiate action against the person. 

 

  1. A situation that you feel demands legal intervention should be taken in that direction, despite the emotional (and/ or financial) difficulty in executing such action against your partner. You can go to your nearest police station to register the FIR against him/her.

 

  1. India’s legal system has provisions that can be applied in combination to prosecute a blackmailing partner for various forms of blackmail. Some of these sections are those related to criminal intimidation (Section 503 and 506), extortion (Section 386), and relevant sections of the IT Act related to violation of privacy (Section 66E).  

 

  1. If you are a minor then the provisions of The Protection of Children From Sexual Offences Act, 2012 is also attracted.

 

  1. If the police officer does not register an FIR against the accused then you can write an application to SSP/Commissioner of the Police District to registered the case. If he does not take appropriate action you can reach out to the Court of Judicial Magistrate by engaging a lawyer.

 

  1. Never take matters into your own hands. No matter how angry, annoyed, frustrated you feel – do not try to harm the person on your own for the sake of revenge. By attempting to harm the blackmailer, you can get yourself involved in criminal activity and it may lower your chances of receiving justice.

 

Remember a blackmailer only holds any power until you fear the threats he has made. Overcoming the fear and finding ways to share it with a trusted person will help remove the root cause for why your blackmailer/partner is able to blackmail you.

For example, if your partner has threatened to leak you pictures, be brave and approach a friend, counsellor or even the police. Once a third party is involved, there is little chance of your partner leaking the pictures because they will be immediately held responsible for a criminal activity. The biggest challenge thus lies in fighting our fears and not allow the partner to take control of an adverse situation.

*To protect the identity, names have been changed and the person/s in the picture is/are models.

Have you ever been blackmailed? What action did you take? Share with Love Matters (LM) on our Facebook page. If you have a specific question, please ask LM experts on our discussion forum.

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Comments
Ritika bete sabse pahle apne aapko shant kijiye!! Marna kisi bhi samasya ka hal nahi hai, So, jine ke liye ready rahiye aur samadhan ke liye bhi, kyunki aisee koi bhi samsya nahi hoti jiska samadhan na ho. Suniye bete aap cyber police ya mahila helpline number par call kar sakti hain - aapki details gopniye rakhi jayengi aur aapko poori madad milegi. Poilce ke naam se dariye nahi. Police aapki madad ke liye hai - Ek baar poilce ko uski poori detail bata dijiye - agar uske baad woh aisa kuch galat kaam karta hai to yeh kanooni taur pe bhi galat hoga. India mein Revenge Porn ek apraadh hai, bete. yadi koi aapke antrang picture ka upyog social sites par karta hai, to aap uske khilaf police me complain/ shikayat darj kara sakti hain - iski bharpayi ke liye IT Act aur IPC ke tahat kai pravdhaan hain - yahan aur detail padho - Aapke dubara likhne ka intezar rahega!! https://lovematters.in/hi/love-and-relationships/revenge-porn-how-to-deal-with-it https://lovematters.in/en/love-and-relationships/blackmail-in-relationships-top-facts https://lovematters.in/hi/love-and-relationships/sexual-harassment/abusive-relationships Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Ranjana bete sabse pahle toh aap unse khul kar kah dijiye ki aap unse koi rishta nahi rakhna chahti, aur wo ye sab harkat karna band kar de - anyatha aap unke khilaf action le sakti hain, OK!! Aap unhe khud kahiye ya kisi bharosemand dost, rishtedaar ya family member ko iske baare mein jaankari dijiye aur unki madad lijiye, ki is tarah pareshan karenge to aap police complaint kar sakti hain aur apne ya unke gharwalon ko bhi is harkat ki jankari de sakti hain. Aap chahen to women's helpline ki bhi madad le sakti hain, thoda himmat dikhaeeye aur is samasya ko khatm karne ki koshish kijiye, Darna nahi bete..OK!! Aapke dubara likhne ka intezaar rahega!! Ise bhi padh lijiye: https://lovematters.in/en/love-and-relationships/blackmail-in-relationships-top-facts Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Bete suniye, darna nahi..pahle apne aap ko shant karo. Aisee koi samasya nahi jiska samadhan na ho- kya aapne iske baare mein kisi se baat ki hai? Apne pariwarwalon se ya apne kisi dost se madad lene ki koshish klijiye- unhe poori sthiti samjhate hue, Ya aap chahen toh kanuni madad bhee le saktin hain. Apne aas paas kisi local police, kisi lawyer/wakeel ya kisi panjikrit NGO se salah lijiye. Bete shayad aapko aisa lag sakta hai ki ye bade bade kadam hain lekin isse behtar ki aap baar blackmail hoti rahen – aapko koi-na-koi kada kadam toh uthana hee hoga- toh kyun na ghar, pariwar ya doston se pahle shuru kiya jaye. Aur jahan tak baat badnaami ki hai toh yeh toh aam dhamki hai jo aurton ko saalon se dee ja rahi hai, lekin bête ismein jitni badnaami aapki hai, utni unki bhee hai- toh kya wo itna bada risk lena pasand karenge- yeh baat khud sochiye- aap unhe behtar janti hain. Kya yeh keval ek gidadbhabhaki toh nahi? Sabse badi galti aap karengi ki – yadi aap darr ke baith jayengi- ek baar unhe lalkaariye aur kahiye ki jo karna hai kar len- phir dekhiye! Akancha puttar aap cyber police ya mahila helpline number pe bhi call kar sakti hain - aapki details gopniye rakhi jayengi aur aapko poori madad milegi. Poilce ke naam se dariye nahi. Police aapki madad ke liye hai - Ek baar poilce ko uski poori detail bata dijiye - agar uske baad woh aisa kuch galat kaam karta hai to yeh kanooni taur pe bhi galat hoga. India mein Revenge Porn ek apraadh hai, bete. yadi koi aapke antrang picture ka upyog karke porn banata hai, to aap uske khilaf police me complain/ shikayat darj kara sakti hain - iski bharpayi ke liye IT Act aur IPC ke tahat kai pravdhaan hain - yahan aur detail padho - https://lovematters.in/hi/love-and-relationships/revenge-porn-how-to-deal-with-it Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Bete kya pareshani hai aur kisne paise maange ya galat karne ke liye puchha?? Aapki baat spasht nahi hai, So sabse pahle apne aap ko thoda shant kijiye, aur apni puri samsya spasht roop se likhiye, taki hum aapko sahi salah de payen, OK!! Yadi aap kisi bhee mudde par humse gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
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