How to say ‘no’?
Shutterstock/Wirestock Creators/Persons in the photo are models. Names changed

How to say ‘no’?

Sahil is friends with Avantika - a girl in his class. They both joke with each other but Avantika now wants to be his girlfriend. Sahil likes her as a friend but has no other feelings for her. If he says no to her, he is afraid to lose a friend. How will he face her every day in class? Have you ever been in a similar situation? Love Matters has some good tips on saying no, at any stage of the relationship. Let’s begin.

These tips are also handy in other no-saying situations – for example, if your partner suggests something that you really don’t want to do.


  1. Try to be honest about why you don’t want to do something like going out with them – without mentioning any physical reasons, such as their weight or poor fashion sense! For example:

‘I’m sorry, but I just don’t feel the same way.’
‘I appreciate the way you feel, but I don’t think it’ll work out.’
‘I’m very busy at the moment, so I just don’t have time for a relationship.’

If you can’t think of anything, then just say ‘no’. You don’t always have to explain yourself.


2. Be firm, so they know you really mean it. But be nice too. Don’t laugh, or say they’re being ridiculous.


3. To make the situation less awkward, try to start a conversation after your turndown. Like, mention a film you’ve just seen, or something funny that just happened to you. If this doesn’t work, just politely excuse yourself and talk to someone else.


4. If the person is a friend, tell them that you appreciate their friendship and hope the two of you can still hang out. It may be awkward for a while and they may need some space to recover. But as long as you treat them normally and respectfully, the friendship may grow stronger.

To protect the identity, the person in the picture is a model and names have been changed. 

Have a story? Share with Love Matters (LM) on our Facebook page. If you have a specific question ask us in the comments. We are also on Instagram, YouTube and Twitter. 

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