date a guy shorter in height
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Should I date a guy shorter in height?

By Auntyji Thursday, May 23, 2019 - 10:43
Hi Auntyji, a guy has proposed to me. I find him interesting but he is shorter in height than me. I am a bit awkward about taking this further. Sejal, 24, Ahmedabad.

Auntyji says, ‘Beta have you heard that Hindi muhavara... about tall trees, no shade?’

Not the done thing

So yes, I can totally understand your trepidation. It's so not the ‘done thing’. But that’s exactly my issue with you young folks these days. You want to change the world and still follow the ghise pite chalan, why!

Batao! It's quite confusing you know. Look around us. Do we see any role models where this is a comfortable fact? Perhaps not many examples. But look again and you will find there are many such examples indeed.

Take the case of our dear Priyanka Chopra and her husband Nick Jonas! Does Nick being short in height makes any difference to Priyanka’s love for him or vice versa?

If you look closely, you will find innumerable other examples from the families of politicians filmi duniya folks both here and Hollywood. So puttar, what really counts is, how you connect with the guy and what your chemistry is with him.

Whose issue is it?

You know beta, I have a friend, who is, by Indian standards, a short man. But he has no issues whatsoever with being with a taller woman. Most of the women he knows used to forever ‘complain’ – ‘I can never wear heels anymore’ etc.

And one day he said, ‘Why not? Whether you are 2 inches taller or 4 is pretty much the same thing to me'.

So see? Maybe we want to introspect whose issue is this – his or yours?  Why do we feel bound by the idea that the man must be taller than the woman?

Kisne bola!

There are many more such stereotypes around. However, no one but you young people can change them – shatter them. The man must be older, he must earn more, he must be more travelled – why?

What if its all ulta – what if the man is somewhat younger, has a smaller salary, is not as tall? Is that the worst match for any girl? Will it be a no for the boy too? There are beliefs in the society that aisee ladki will forever show him down and never respect him?

I ask why? Kisne bola? Are these attributes there to earn respect – to earn stature? Not at all. These are just man-made or societal assumptions. The reality is far from it beta.

Heads and shoulders ahead

There is another person I know – most of his girlfriends are taller than him, slim and quite good looking, working women. How come, one would ask – and he responds– ‘I love tall women’. Walking with one makes me feel so confident, so assured of myself, he says.  

Now that's one kind of a guy. While the other one is, who said, ‘Yes girls always must be shorter than the man – so that they always have to look up to him and he can always look down at them?’

So bolo beta Sejal, which one would you rather be with?

Height-wise works only in a school assembly line, not in a line of life choices. Choose him for what he is and what you feel with him – not his inches and centimetres, in any sphere – samjhee na?

*To protect the identity, names have been changed. 

Guys, would you date someone taller than you? Girls, would you date someone shorter? Comment below or share with Love Matters (LM) on our Facebook page. If you have a specific question, please ask LM experts on our discussion forum.


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