who should call first on a date
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Should I call him after a date?

By Auntyji Tuesday, November 26, 2019 - 12:02
Hi Aunty ji, I really like a guy and we met through an online dating app. Everything went well and we exchanged numbers. However, it’s been two days and he has not called. Would I look desperate if I call? Should I call first? Tanika, 19, Haldwani.

Auntyji says, ‘Beta, its kudiyon ka zamaana…you do know that, hain na?’

Your time is here

So who has made this rule that only the male can call? Men must pursue, women must wait? Back in Rajesh Khanna’s time maybe – but now – hell no beti Tanika. Gone are those days. I’d say – pick up that phone –options galore. Call? Text? Ping? Message – anything. 

Take a step forward Tanika. Your time is here. 

Arey, you like the boy! Why the jhijhak! It’s time you ladki log claim your right - to khulla declare your likes and dislikes, and you don’t have to wait for the guy’s meherbani for it. 

Go for it

I’d say yes, make the move. Say Hi and then wait. BUT I have a rule – wait for how much and how long? A day?  Two? A month? Set a limit. That if you don’t hear back within that time frame, you will pack it up right there and then.

Then you won't stalk and follow, make excuses ‘maybe his WhatsApp is not working’, ‘maybe his phone fell in the pot’. Nopes! Done is done.  

There is absolutely no need nor time, if you ask me, to wait like Paro of Devdas – for him to call you – and when he does, you perk up like a sunflower to a warm ray! Forget it.

Remember, his not getting back to you is not a comment on you as a person – it may be so many things! You may not be the girl he wants – which does not mean you have to  become what he wants – ok? May be he is shy. May be broke his arm! And baby, maybe, he’s not that into you. Koi gall nahin! 

Best foot forward 

But make that effort Tanika – sure. Do it so that you don’t feel in the end – ‘I let a good thing go’. Its assertion of your own choice – you liked someone! 

Also, kaunsee itni badi baat hain! You are checking if it’s worth a second date – you aren’t running behind him with an ek chutki sindoor, are you?

And in defence of the guy, he may be the naya zamana kind, the cool guy who is giving you your space - ’if she liked me she will call me’. That’s petty hip too – isn’t it? 

Are you worried that he will say, No! Well, if that’s the way he feels, isn’t it better for you to find out sooner and move on? Instead of staring at your phone, waiting it out like Veer of Veer Zara! I do like these long-lost romances though. Wah wah…  

Times have changed ladies – so be ready for it both ways. Embrace the freedom and equally, be ready to give it too. If things work – fine. If not, that’s fine too. Don't’ be the next bore in town. Put yourself out, have fun and who knows, the person you sit next to may well be a real cute guy or girl – someone you really hit it off with! Ho to good, na ho, toh be good!

To protect the identity, names have been changed. 

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