Auntyji says… Oho… What can I say beta? Boyfriend bana FBI? Aye haye! What’s wrong with the man? Let’s see what to do.
In great detail
So bitiya sunnn! Traditionally speaking, when our present partner asks us about our sexual and niji history, we are supposed to have some typical reactions. Your partner asks you, “Have you had sex before?” Whatever you say they’d rather like to hear, “No! You are my first!”
Now, the game is changing its dynamics. Young people, I assume don’t like to hide anything. “I was in a relationship before and yes, I had sex.” This should not mean you have to discuss it over and over and analyse the facts, figures, positions and outcomes.
On closer inspection
Beta, as gross as it sounds, people also use sex-with-ex-talk to get turned on. “Tell me what you did? What was your favourite part? Where did you like to do it? Did you like it with lights on or off?" So many questions! Just because you are happy to supply the jaankari, right?
This sensational talk may help your sex life scale new heights. However, it’s clearly about you two. If you ask me, talking about someone else in the bedroom should be an inconsequential task.
I do agree that this same sexy and raunchy stuff if repeated every time and everywhere can become an irritating ‘Q&A session’. “Yeh bata, how many times with the last one? Where and why?”
Hainnn? Dude, it’s supposed to be our bedroom talk not boardroom deliberations, isn’t it?
Read more about communication with your partner!
Talking about someone else in the bedroom should be an inconsequential task
Past to present
So what’s with the tehkikaat bro? Is he finding it so difficult to deal with his girl’s history? It seems like your past situation has become his present obsession, hain? Not a new story, I must say.
Ex-lovers have a way of making their presence felt in your present life. What I don’t understand here is the continuous cross-questioning. Is it a trust issue between you two? Or is it an issue of self-esteem?
“She must have been with guys better than me. Am I really good enough for her?” These might be a few concerns lingering at the top of his mind. Beta, call him over, sit down with him and start a charcha. Tell him clearly that baar baar sawaal is no fun. In fact, it’s a total turn-off to then have sex baar baarI He needs to cut it out.
Ask him what’s bothering him. Assuage him and calm the man down. Give him a good performance appraisal. Don’t forget the usual caveat that this is the last time other invisible folks are going to take centre stage in your bedroom.
Waise betaji, in my opinion, yeh ‘I tell my partner everything about my past’ philosophy thodi overrated hai. People may ask for the truth but very often, they can’t handle it.
Share, be open, but perhaps in a limited version. Do not share the entire four volumes of 50 shades of Technicolour.
To protect the privacy of the author, the person in the picture is a model.
This article was first published on Jan 31, 2017.