First time sex
© Love Matters

First time sex: what are your tips Auntyji?

By Auntyji Tuesday, March 26, 2013 - 16:38
Auntyji, I am 18 and all set to lose my virginity to my boyfriend very soon. Is there anything I should definitely take care of apart from condoms? Swati, Noida

Auntyji says... Swati puttar, kya baat hai ji. First time sex can be very exciting and very scary at the same time, not to mention sensual, embarrassing, awkward and fun. So I am glad that you want be ready for it.

It makes me so happy that sex is finally getting out of closet. Makes sense too, because the more we talk about it, the better prepared we will be for it. And as you know what’s natural is never vulgar. But I’m diverging from your question. Puttarji, my super simple advice to you would be to play it very safe, know what you’re doing and when in doubt, just take it slow.

Now we all know about safe sex. Condom is a definite must. Not just to avoid pregnancy but also to keep most sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) at bay as well. I know a lot of people insist that condoms take away from real pleasure, but don’t take their word. And if your boyfriend has any issues, feel free to use the female condom. I know it can be slightly cumbersome, but definitely worth it.

Birth control

Another thing you should think about. Now, condoms are a good method of birth control, they protect you from disease, and they’re easy to get hold of. But they are not as reliable as hormonal methods like the pill. So you should ask yourself, "How would it be if I got pregnant?" If your answer is "A total disaster!" then you should think about using another form of birth control as well as a condom.

Here you can read about different birth control methods. And for confidential help you can contact our good friends FPA India – you can find their clinic nearest to you on their home page.

Kissing and caressing

Now, finally my two words on how best to enjoy your experience. Now I am assuming that you already know how you actually have intercourse with him. What I can tell you is not to take things too seriously. It’s not just an act, it’s also an emotion and an experience. So savour every moment of it. You might fumble a bit, but you’ll learn a lot as well. It’s difficult to go wrong with a lot of kissing, caressing and touching. Remember there are many ways to make love.

Puttarji you might think of me as old fashioned, but truth is that one should have sex for the right reason and with the right person. When it comes to great sex, just like cricket, timing is everything. Worry not, there is no guesswork required here. Your body will tell you when the time is right and your heart will tell you who the right guy is. But even your diehard romantic aunty will tell you to run the decision through your head before you execute it.

Pain?

I’d say that don’t worry about experimentation and diversity of positions. Just relax and take it slow. Save a few moves for the second time as well.

You might anticipate some pain or discomfort, but with time and practice, you’ll ease into it. The main thing is to take plenty of time to get really, really aroused so your vagina is very wet before you try taking his penis inside you. The main reason for first time sex to be painful is if you are so nervous and distracted that you aren’t properly turned on, and your vagina tenses up. If need be, feel free to use a lubricant or ask your boyfriend for a time out.

Exhilarating

Well Swati, as long as you know what you’re getting into, there won’t be many unpleasant surprises. There might be some awkward moments, but this will be something you’ll remember for a lifetime. In fact I am slightly jealous because first-time sex is definitely the most exhilarating thing that I won’t experience again. Now I am not that naughty that I’d ask you for reviews, but do have fun puttar.

To protect the identity, the person in the picture is a model and names have been changed. 

Have a query on first-time sex? Share with Love Matters (LM) on our Facebook page. If you have a specific question, please ask LM experts on our discussion forum. We are also on Instagram, YouTube and Twitter. 

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Comments
Actually yeh poori tarah se na, ladki ki mahavari pe depend hota hai, yadi woh bilkul nirdharit hai ya nahin jiski vajah se bohot hi risk ka kaam bhi hai. Yadi aap bina kisi protection ke ya bina surakhsha ke sex ki soch rahe hai toh shayad aap un dino ki baat kar rahe hain jin mein bachcha rukna mushkil hai. Yeh ho toh sakta hai lekin yeh poori tarha se surakshit nahin mana jaata hai. Yadi aap pregnancy ke risk se bachna chahte hai to kisi aur tarike ke mukaable Condom ka istemal hi easy aur safe tarika hai https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/safe-sex https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/fertility Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Jab mai gf ke saath sex karane suru karta hue tho mere penis Se turant semen nikal jata hai.isliye mai pareshan hue plz guide me.
Bete Rahul, sabse pehle toh pareshan nahi hona. Okay? Jaldi semen nikalna ya premature ejaculation koi chinta ki baat nahi hai. sabse pehle toh apni partner ki body ko samjh lo- usko time de do. Aur yadi shareer mein uttejna adhik ho, sex ki bhavna zyada hogi toh sheegra hi patan hone ki sambhavna bhi adhik ho sakti hai. Aisi stithi mein, partner par focus badhana, foreplay, yaani bete ki pravesh karne se pehle bahut se alag alag kriyaen karna , jinse dono ko anand mile, apne partner ki uttejna badhana, yeh sab activities sabse zaroori hain. Iske ilava, partner ke saath sex karne se pehle, ek baar hast maithun kar saktey hain, utne samay pehle jitne mein ling mein tanaav aa jaaye. Condom ka istemaal bhi jaldi discharge kum karne mein madadgaar saabit ho sakta hai. https://lovematters.in/hi/news/premature-ejaculation-top-five-facts https://lovematters.in/en/news/i-am-suffering-from-premature-ejaculation https://lovematters.in/en/news/premature-ejaculation-couples-problem Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Sahi - Galat ka nirnay, sirf hum khud hee le saktey hain.,Aur koi nahin kar sakta humare liye . Apne se umar mein badi mahila ke saath sambadh ke bare mein bahut se log sochtey hain. Lekin apki is soch ke karan kahin aap kisi badi musibat mein na padd jaye isliye zara aap svyum chintan kar leejiye Yeh aap svyum chintan kar leejiye, aur soch leejiye. Jara yeh writup bhi padh lo : https://lovematters.in/hi/news/should-i-try-sex-older-woman Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Dekho bete anal sex ya guda methun ke baare mein ye baatein jaan lena zaruri hai: Yadi dono partners ki poori sehmati hai isse karne mein toh kar saktay hai lekin wo part bohot dry hota hai jiske liye koi chiknai Jaise KY jelly ka istemal kiya ja sakta hai ya chikanai yukt condom bhi use kar saktay hai, yadi condom ka istemal kiya jaey to koi side effect nahi hai. LEKIN, yeh jaan lijiye ki Har koi hark ism ke sex ke liye tayyar nahin ho jaate – isme unki marzee honi chhaiye. Yadi unhe yeh pasand nahin toh iska matlab hai, NAHIN. Samajh Gaye? Ye bhi padho: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/anal-sex Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Aunty ji main ek 22 saal ka ladka hu or 12 saal ki umar se hasthmaithun (masturbation) ka addicted hu or iski vajah se mere king me kafi kamjori as gyi h jaise sigarpatan or dilhapan or is I vajah se main an kisi ladki se sex karne se bhi darta hu... Plz mujhe in San baton se bacne or jindagi ko naye sire se annad purn June me liye much tips. .. Dijiye plz .. I am so scared ..
Rohan bete, koi tension ki baat nahi hai. thakaan ko kamzori na samjho bête!! it’s quite common, Bas swasth raho aur yaad rakho ki Hastmaithun ek safe/surakshit tareeka hai apni santushti karne ka. Isse koi nuksaan ya beemari nahin hoti, yadi chahein toh bahut see activities hain, jinmein aap samya bitaa sakte hain. jaise ki khel – games, gym ya koi hobbies…ok? Yeh bhi padhiye: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/men-masturbating https://lovematters.in/en/news/i-could-masturbate-anytime-anywhere https://lovematters.in/en/resource/masturbating Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Auntyji namaste auntyji mjh apse ye puchna h mera bf h or wo mere sth sex krna chahta h or me bhi uske sth krna chati hu bt jb bhi krne ki sochti hu to bad me mera maan badal jata h fir mera maan ni krta ki me sex kru aisa kyu hota h mere sth mere sth har br aisa hi hota h plzzz auntyji give me ans
Namaste beteji! Dekhiye apko pareshan hone ki zarurat nahi hai. Jab tak ap puri tarah se taiyar nahi ho jati aur mann nahi banaa leti tab tak kuchh mat kariye. Koi bhi apko force nahi kar saktaa hai. Aur haan, kisi ke dawaab mein na aiyega. Okay na? Ye bhi padh lijiye: https://lovematters.in/en/news/how-can-i-convince-her-have-sex https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/love-and-relationships Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Nahi beteji! Ling ka size kisi bhi tarah se nahi badal saktaa. Iss baree mein aur jankari yahaa haasil karein: https://lovematters.in/en/resource/penis-shapes-and-sizes https://lovematters.in/en/news/penis-top-five-facts Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Ling ke size ki sahi jaankari yahan se hasil karo aap https://lovematters.in/en/resource/penis-shapes-and-sizes Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Bete ramesh periods aaye hain toh pregnancy ka darr nahi hai lekin ek home pregnancy test le lijiye. Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/hi/forum
Jee nahi yeh common hai yeh padh lijiye: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/penis-shapes-and-sizes Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/hi/forum
arvind das
Mon, 09/19/2016 - 00:41
Mere L***d me top pe kala kala dhabba ho gya hai.kya iska ilaj h.hai to please help me. Air ek bat hastmtn Marne se top se Judi has tut gya h iske karan to kala dhabba to nahi hua.please anty j help
i m. armaan
Mon, 10/03/2016 - 23:55
Hello anty ji. How. R u me apni gf k saat sex krna chata hu magar meine.kabhi pahle sex nhi kiya please bataeyeh me. Kya kru
Bête Pehli baar sex kartaye samaye kya karna hai kya nahi karna hai, aur first sex ko kese theek tarah se kiya jaye is bare mein aap yaha detail mein padh lijieye : https://lovematters.in/hi/news/first-time-sex-top-five-facts Saath hi sex activity mein alag-alag tariko ka istemal kartay huay isse kese aur majjaydaar banana hai is baaray mein yaha padhein: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/ways-make-love https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/making-love Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Antiji me apni girlfriend ke sath iss baar anal intercourse chahta hu kya koi aisi liquid ya tube he jise anal me softness aa jaaye or mera uske anal me araam se chala jaaye. Plssss
Yadi dono partners ki poori sehmati hai issey karney may to kar saktay hai lekin wo part bohot dry hota hai jiksey liey koi chiknai Jaise KY jelly ka istemal kiya ja sakta hai ya chikanai yukt condom bhi use kar saktay hai, yadi condom ka istemal kiya jaey to koi side effect nahi hai. LEKIN, yeh jaan leejiye ki Har koi hark ism ke sex ke liye tayyar nahin ho jaate – isme unki marzee honi chhaiye. Yadi unhe yeh pasand nahin toh iska matlab hai ,NAHIN. Samjh Gaye? https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/anal-sex Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Hii aunty ji... I'm gud in romance but bad in sex. ..mene apni gf ke saath kafi tym try kiya hai but mera injctn uski pussy me nhi enter kar pata. ..plzzz help me kse enter krun. .n I need some tips about sex plzzzzz
kashmira sk
Wed, 12/07/2016 - 10:43
Aunty ji Meri shadi ko 1year se jayada ho gaya hai but Abhi tak me pregnant ni hui PTA ni kya problem h sex bhi bahot hota h fir bhi plz tell me what I do ????
Hmmm! Kya aap is bare mein abhi tak Kisi doctor se millein hai? Ek vishagya ya achche panjikrit doctor se consult kijiye. Aur Jaldi pregnancy ke tips yaha pahdiye: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/tips Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
sriya swain
Thu, 12/29/2016 - 12:15
mere bf k saath me pehli baar sex ki likin meri bf ka doubt ye he ki mere pehle sex me unka penis andar kse aram se ghus gaya or dhila kse ho sakta he me bahut tense hu kya karu
Kaumarya ka poora daromadaar hymen ya jhilli se juda hua hai. Yaad rakhiye ki yeh bahut hee asani se toot saktee hai, jese cycling, horse riding ya khel-kud ke duran.Yeh ho sakta hai ki wahan ke muscles thode khul jaaye, jo ki bada hone ka ehsaas deyta hai. yeh uamr ke saath bhi ho sakta hai, sirf sex se ho yeh zaroori nahin. Ab isko aap ek aur nazar se bhi dekh sakety hain aur who yeh hai ki aap bhi yeh keh saktee hai ki unka size aapko chota lagta hai, so kya who kuch kar saktey hain? Nahin na? So yeh baat ka kya phayda? Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
jacky chand
Thu, 12/29/2016 - 13:50
mam mai apni gf ke sath uske period khtam hone ke 3-4 din bad bina condom ke sex kiya but abhi mera ling halka sa lagbhag 0.3% hi andar tha ki mera halka sa sparm nikal gya isse pregnancy ka khatara to ni hoga... plz tell me
Bete yadi yeh sex unsafe tha toh yes ismein pregnancy ke chances ho skate hain. Iske liye phoren ek home pregnancy test lijiye. Phir kisi vishagya ya achche panjikrit doctor se milo aur dekho kya ho sakta hai. Iske illava aap FPAI clinic se bhee sampark kar sakety hai jiski jaankari aaapko iski website pe mil jayegi. https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/unplanned-pregnancy https://www.fpaindia.org/ Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Raj pratap
Sat, 01/14/2017 - 06:52
Aantyi ji, pahle to apko dil ke har kone se Pranaam~ aantyi ji, meri problam yeh hai ki mai raat ko jab sota hu tab pata nahi kab mera viryapat ho jata h aur mujhe pata bhi nahi chalta h aisi problam 4 bar se ho rahi h | kripya mujhe Jaldi aur uchit adwise De anttyi ji. (Pranaam)
Pranaam, pratap beta! Bete ise swapandosh ya nightfall kehte hain jo ki bohot common hai. Yeh koi bimaari nahi jiska ilaaj maujood ho, isse aapko koi nuksan nahi hoga so don't worry. Baaki aap yaha padh lo : https://lovematters.in/hi/news/wet-dreams-top-five-facts Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Raj pratap
Sun, 01/15/2017 - 08:38
Auntyi ji, Pranaam ! Auntyi ji, Kya periouds ke dauran sex karna sahi rahega? Kya Is time pregnent hone ka jyada chances hote hai ?
Period ke DAURAAN? Tab toh pregnant hone ka chance na ke barabr hai beta.Phir bhi kisi bhi risk ya sankramn se bachne ke liye condom ka isteaml anivarya hai. https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/faqs-period https://lovematters.in/hi/news/sex-during-my-period-do-i-need-contraception Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Umesh aTri
Sun, 02/05/2017 - 23:25
Namaste aunty ji mai 21 saal ka hu mujhe jawan se jyada 30-35 ki ladies psand aati h kya koi iski khaas vajah h or mai 8 ladies ke saath rishte bana chuka hu with safety kya mai continue karu
Sahi - Galat ka nirnay, sirf hum khud hee le saktey hain.,Aur koi nahin kar sakta humare liye . Apne se umar mein badi mahila ke saath sambadh ke bare mein bahut se log sochtey hain. Lekin apki is soch ke karan kahin aap kisi badi musibat mein na padd jaye isliye zara aap svyum chintan kar leejiye Yeh aap svyum chintan kar leejiye, aur soch leejiye. Jara yeh writup bhi padh lo : https://lovematters.in/hi/news/should-i-try-sex-older-woman Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Anil parmar
Sat, 02/25/2017 - 10:45
Aunti ji mne mari gf ke sath first time sex kiya lekin use bleeding bhi hui or dard bhi bhut hua or uska time period ka tha Mtlb ane ka time tha pr Kuch din bad gye the uske bich me mne sex kr liya uske sath lekin uske bd uske period Nhi a rhe h to kya ye Kuch prb h kya Aunti Ji ple mujhe eska bare me kuch jankari dijiye pleeeeeeee mam
Anil beta, yadi yeh sex unsafe tha toh yes ismein pregnancy ke chances ho skate hain. Iske liye phoren ek home pregnancy test lijiye. Phir kisi vishagya ya achche panjikrit doctor se milo aur dekho kya ho sakta hai. Iske illava aap FPAI clinic se bhee sampark kar sakety hai jiski jaankari aaapko iski website pe mil jayegi. https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/unplanned-pregnancy https://www.fpaindia.org/ Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Rohan beta, actually yeh poori tarah se na, ladki ki mahavari pe depend hota hai, yadi woh bilkul nirdharit hai ya nahin jiski vajah se bohot hi risk ka kaam bhi hai. Yadi aap bina kisi protection ke ya bina surakhsha ke sex ki soch rahe hai toh shayad aap un dino ki baat kar rahe hain jin mein bachcha rukna mushkil hai. Yeh ho toh sakta hai lekin yeh poori tarha se surakshit nahin mana jaata hai. Yadi aap pregnancy ke risk se bachna chahte hai to kisi aur tarike ke mukaable condom ka istemal hi easy aur safe tarika hai https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/safe-sex https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/fertility Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
roshan(ranchi)
Mon, 03/27/2017 - 06:41
Auntijy mera penis bhut mota hai or lamba hai meri gf mujhse sex krna chahti hai or Mai v magar wo mera penis handle Ni Kr pati.chillati hai use sirf anguli se hi maza Ata hai Mai kru help me
Roshan beta, yoni bahut choti hoti hai aur lacheele bhi. So Jald baazi mat keejiye, phele finger se try keejiye, koi lubrication use keejye… Lekin apki partner ko bahut hee relaxed rehana hai aur apko bhi is dauran bahut hee support karna hai. Poora ling ek hee baar andar jaaye yeh bilkul zaroori nahin, aur na hee iski rai dee jaati hai. iske barre mein yeh padhiye. https://lovematters.in/hi/news/first-time-sex-top-five-facts Yadi sex dono pyaar ke saathiyoun ke beech ho, surakshit yaani bina koi zore zabardasti ke ho, so bahut hee achcha. Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Dekho bête yeh keh pana ki kaun kab aur kis din garb dharan kar lega ya falana din mein koi garbh dharn kar leta hai zara mushkil hai kyunki yeh Har kisi ke liye alag hai. iss baare mein aur jyada detail mein yah padhiye: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/pregnancy https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/fertility Saath hi jaldi pregnancy ke tips bhi yaha padh lijiye: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/tips Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Namsty aunty ji,meri umer 19 h, m thoda confuse hu mera ling teda ho gya h or m hastmatun kerta hu ,mene aaj tak kisi b ladki k sath sex nahi kiya h , kya tede ling k karan muje Army Ki Doctory m ya sex kerne m koi problam hogi ... please aunty ji tell me about this
Namastey, Sumit beta. Ling ke size mein ek apna teda pann hona is quite common bete don't worry isse koi samsya hoti nahin hai. Yeh padhiye zara: https://lovematters.in/en/resource/penis-shapes-and-sizes Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
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