My friend, Arjun always knew how to give me advice about stuff like this because he was older than me and we grew up together. “The first time you have sex is always bad," he said. "You can’t avoid it. Show me someone who says it’s good and I’ll show you a liar.”
I kept that with me and found that my first time having sex was equal parts confusing, scary and frustrating. However, it was nothing compared the story of another friend’s first time which is one of the best stories I have heard.
This guy was a shy kid who didn’t have many relationships through school and college. He finally went to study in San Francisco and from looking his Facebook posts, I could tell he had begun opening up to people around him in a big way. One fine day, I got a message to come onto Skype at a certain time because he had big news.
A drunken haze…
On my computer screen I saw the face of a man who couldn’t stop smiling. He told me that he finally had sex and I was excited to find out how it went. He told me that he had gone over to his friend’s house for dinner one night and his friend and girlfriend had invited a couple of other people but there was this really cute girl who joined them as well.
My friend knew this girl and they had met a few times in the past, he had told me that she was cool but this very same friend of his had warned him that he won’t get anywhere with her, so he didn’t try anything.
Anyway the dinner went really well, they had plenty to drink and they swiftly went to a bar soon after. As the night wore on, the other guy who had come over left soon after. The four of them continued to chat and they then in a drunken haze decided to go to a night club.
They hit it off…
Here they danced for a bit before the couple that invited them both decided to call it a night and go home. That left just the two of them on the dance floor surrounded by strangers. Suddenly, she pulls him in for a kiss which caught him completely off-guard but it was safe to say the two of them hit it off.
They go back to her apartment where things started progressing rapidly. Before he knew it the two of them were naked and going at it. My poor confused friend was trying his best to keep up but for some reason the girl seemed equally lost.
Completely clueless
Finally, the girl whispered to him, “I’ve never been with a man before.” To which he replied, “You know what, nor have I!” She then said, “No, it’s because I’m a lesbian.” My jaw dropped at this point. This was funny yet amazing at the same time.
I asked him if it was good and he said it was terrible because now both of them were completely clueless about what to do next! Eventually, they gave up and both went to sleep. I was glad for him because in my opinion it’s better to have a funny first time story rather than an awkward one.
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