Woman fertility
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Will it be tough to conceive if I marry late?

By Auntyji Thursday, August 29, 2019 - 10:28
Hi Aunty ji, I am 28 and my parents are putting pressure on me for marriage saying my ‘biological clock’ is ticking. Would it be tough for me to conceive if I marry late? Is it true? Namita, 28, Jageshwar.

Auntyji says, ‘Its remarkable when parents take on a doctor’s avatar and begin to predict what your uterus can or cannot do – isn’t it’?

Who’s in a hurry?

Batao – not only are your parents hurrying to get you into marriage – they are also putting the baccha paida karo pressure side by side. Your parents are working it the other way round – that your clock is ticking so you must marry. 

Ganeemat hai that they are not saying when you retire our grandkids will not be able to avail this or that benefit so you must hurry with the reproduction. 

Though the body’s reproductive capability does decline after a certain age (post 35). However, as long as you are healthy and fit and your eggs are in circulation, you can conceive

Turn off the alarm

But, lets not trip over ourselves. There is nothing to be so disconcerted about! Let me tell you – having late babies is no reason to get hasten up anything, and definitely not marriage!

Namita beta, do you even want to marry yet – since by and large that seems to be a pre-qualification for having babies – samaj wise!  

Put baby talk aside – don’t let this fear frighten you into rushing into something you are not ready for. To begin with you will need to put in a lot of effort into getting to know your partner – if and when you find the right one. You will spend time getting to know them, their family, managing your relationships and sex life and work life and family life all at the same time.

Oh God! I am tiring myself already! That in itself will take some doing. Who can tell what cards you get dealt in that regard Namita – maybe you want to prepare for that before you start thinking up babies.

Prep time

Planning a child is no child’s play – you need to be really grown up for it. Really ready and mature. This old concept – that kids will ‘come up on their own’ or ‘bachhe apne aap pal jayenge’ is a misnomer. Kids have to be brought up – with a lot of hard work!

Namita – having a child calls for many changes in your routine, in our everyday life – are you ready for that? 

You don’t even know if you want a baby with the person you marry, or for that matter if that person wants a baby. Also, what does he turn out to be – a loving, supportive pal cum partner or someone completely different? 

Not quite yet

Have a word with the parents – on all these issues and ask them nicely to basically back off a little. Let them support what you want to do and aspire to do as opposed to panning baby parties. Ask for time to think about who and what kind of a person you want to marry, if at all. 

Get used to that first beta Namita, and consider the baby – later, much later. Let's not jump the gun as they say. Oye hoye! 

Now I have an idea I am going to sell to clock companies! Let’s make biological clocks for women and call them No’logical clock! Special offer for illogical adults. 

To protect the identity, names have been changed. 

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