Sex after pregnancy: do's and don'ts
Andy Dean Photography

Sex after pregnancy: do's and don'ts

By Stephanie Haase Friday, May 2, 2014 - 09:59
Giving birth to a baby is a magical experience. But it can be difficult to initiate sex again after delivery. Many couples are unsure of when the right time is to start making love, and don't really know what to look out for.

 

Do...

  • take your time
    While giving birth, a woman's vagina and perineum can get injured or even cut by the surgeon, for example with an episiotomy. There may be stitches or wounds that need time to heal. For the new mother, these wounds can cause discomfort and even bad pain when making love.

    To give your body time to heal, doctors say you should wait four to six weeks after delivery before having sex again. But every woman is different, and if you don't feel ready to try yet, take your time and don't rush into something you aren't ready to do.  
  • … be intimate
    The fact that you just had a baby and you shouldn't be having sex doesn't mean you can't be intimate with your partner. Even if you are tired, you can still cuddle, or stroke and caress each other's bodies. You can also masturbate each other or give your partner oral sex. Be careful though: a woman should not have oral sex done on her right after birth! There is a chance of infection until all tissue has healed properly!

    Being intimate can be important after having a baby. With everything revolving around the child, a relationship can get neglected. A bit of intimacy at the right time can help prevent that and make you feel close to your partner!
  • get involved
    For new fathers, the situation can be a bit puzzling. They often don't quite know how to best approach their partners about wanting to have sex again. The new mother may seem to have so many things on her mind that you don't know how to make your needs heard. Your best bet is to simply get involved. Be there for her when she needs help. Offer to watch the baby so she can shower and take a nap. She will be grateful for that. And, for many women, having the father of the child be an active part in the daily responsibilities is super sexy.  

    And get her out of the house. Just a walk in the park or a lunch out to take her away from home might be all she needs to feel a bit relaxed and connected to you.

    Finally: let her know that you still find her attractive. Many women struggle with their bodies and self-esteem after giving birth, and might be scared to show themselves to their partner. So be supportive and let her know she is beautiful to you.

Don't...

  • push yourself
    Many women experience changes in their body after giving birth. Some of these changes can affect your sex life.

    Vaginal dryness for example. Lots of extra lubrication can help with that and make sex less uncomfortable.  

    But there can be other reasons why you don't want to have sex yet. Some women experience so-called post-partum depression after having a baby. The changing hormonal levels are like a roller-coaster ride for your body and may leave you feeling sad and depressed. And that affects your sex drive!

    Or you are just tired and burned out. Or you just don't feel ready. Or your partner doesn't feel ready.

    Whatever the reasons may be: don't push it, give yourselves and your body the time you need!
  • … be afraid of telling your partner what you want and need
    Don't expect your partner to just understand what's going on with you. Many things have changed and it may be difficult to understand all of them straight away. Men might not realise that breasts can be tender and need much more sensitive touch than usual. And a woman may not understand that her partner feels uncomfortable initiating sex again after witnessing childbirth.

    As with every issue in a relationship, talking about it and being honest is the best way to go. Tell your partner what you want and need from them at this moment. And ask what he or she needs.

    And then, try together. Don't be afraid to admit something isn't working. Take it lightly and try something else. It's up to you to decide what works and what doesn't.
  • … worry if something unexpected happened
    Alongside the vaginal dryness, a whole lot of other unexpected things can happen once you start having sex again.

    It's not unusual to have some urine leaking, because your pelvic floor muscles aren't back in shape yet. Doing Kegel exercises can help.

    Pain in and around your vagina is also possible. Try having your partner go super slow, or not entering your vagina fully at first. And, use lubrication.

    Spontaneous milk squirts can also happen. It can help to feed your baby before sex; which has the added benefit of a low chance of getting disturbed, as well!

    On a much more positive note, many women experience more pleasure after giving birth. Multiple or more intense orgasms are common. That sounds like a pretty good reason to start trying again, doesn't it?

If you've got more tips to share with other readers, do go ahead and leave a comment below or start a thread or Facebook

Did you find this useful?

Comments
Ohhh! Bete Rupesh apni sthithi samjhne ke liye aap zara detail mein yeh link padh lijiye: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/when-things-go-wrong Saath hee kisi vishagya ya achche panjikrit doctor se bhi mill lijiye.
auntyji namste.. may 22 sal ka hu or meri ek gf h me jab v usse sex krta hu to jald hi mera virya nikal aata h or vo santust nhi ho pati isliye mujhe koi aisa upai btaye ki may der tak sex kr saku or apni gf ko santust kr saku.... plzz aunty ji help me
Aunty ji namaste me Jb bhi apni wife k sath sex krta hu to usko bhut pain hoti hai orpr fir bhi wo mera pura sath deti hai pr mujko Acha nhi lgta k usko badme pain hoti hai kya kre
Aunty ji namaste me Jb bhi apni wife k sath sex krta hu to usko bhut pain hoti hai orpr fir bhi wo mera pura sath deti hai pr mujko Acha nhi lgta k usko badme pain hoti hai kya kre
vishnu tiwari
Wed, 01/14/2015 - 18:06
mare age 45Year ki hai ma rooj sex kaqta hoo koi deekt nahi hoti lakin patni sath nahi dti uski bhee age35year hai
Gourav bete! Hatsmethun se koi koi nuksaan ya beemari nahin hoti, yadi chahein toh bahut see activities hain, jaise ki khel – games, gym ya koi hobbies…in mein involve ho sakte hain, shayad ye bhi madad karein! Ok?
bete suniye Shuru se third month tak aur phir saatvein mahene se le kar …. Is samy avoid keejiye. Jo wife ko pasansd ho who hee keejiye , jo doctor salaah de who bhi samjh leejiye. Aur dekho bête behtar hoga ki aap condom ka isltemal karein. Ya phir discharge andar NA hone dein. Iske ilava wife ki comfort ka poora dhyaan keejiye. http://lovematters.in/en/comment/13731#comment-13731
Suniye Shuru se third month tak aur phir saatvein mahene se le kar …. Is samy avoid keejiye. Jo apko pasansd ho who hee keejiye , jo doctor salaah de who bhi samjh leejiye. Aur dekho bête behtar hoga ki aap condom ka isltemal karein. Ya phir discharge andar NA hone dein. Iske ilava apni comfort ka poora dhyaan keejiye. http://lovematters.in/en/comment/13731#comment-13731
KS Pathania
Sat, 03/21/2015 - 21:51
aunty ji ma 28 yr ka hu mari sadi ko 5 yr ho gay hai ma shru shru mein 7-8 bar sex kar ta tha abi sirf 2 bar pata nai kya ho gayea hai abi 2 bar sex karne ke bad lun khada nai hota hor wife be bol te hai ke kya huya jo lun abi khada nai hota es ke bare me bathao
Suniye Shuru se third month tak aur phir saatvein mahene se le kar …. Is samy avoid keejiye. Jo apko pasansd ho who hee keejiye , jo doctor salaah de who bhi samjh leejiye. Aur dekho bête behtar hoga ki aap condom ka isltemal karein. Ya phir discharge andar NA hone dein. Iske ilava apni comfort ka poora dhyaan keejiye. http://lovematters.in/en/comment/13731#comment-13731 Aur saroj bete unhe zara samjhahiyey ki Biwi bhi Un hee ki hai aur hone waala bachcha bhi- zara normal mein rahein toh behtar. ab mein yeh baat maanne ko tayyer nahi ki “ mere husband nahin maantey” aap zara pakke ho ke unhe samjhaiye, ab har baat mein maan mat jaaiyey please! Yeh aapke aur aapke hone waale bacche ki liye hain, hain na… come on, you can do it!.
aunty ji plz ye btaye ki hum log abhi baby nahi chahte hain to mc ke kitne dino bad bina condom ke sex karna chahiye jisse pregnent na ho..
Actually yeh poori tareh se na, ladki kee mahavari pe depend hota hai, yadi who bilkul nirdharit hai ya nahin jiski vajeh se bahut hee risk ka kaam bhi hai. Yadi aap bina kisi protection key ya bina surakhsha ke sex ki soch rahe hai toh shayad aap un dino ki baat kar rahe hain jin mein bachcha rukna mushkil hai. Yeh ho toh sakta hai lekin yeh poori terh se surakshit nahin mana jaata hai. yadi aap pregnancy ke risk se bachna chatay hai to kisi aur tarikay kay mukabley Condom ka istemal hi easy aur safe tarika hai http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/safe-sex http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/fertility
anuj varma
Fri, 06/26/2015 - 10:16
mam meri wife ko sex psnd nhi h is karan wo mera sath nhi deti pr mere liye wo ready rhti h bt mai chahta hu bi meri tra excited ho mam plz kuch upaye batao
Hmm! aisa kyun ho raha hai? kya aap koi aisi activity kar rahe hain jo ki unhe pasand nahi aa rahi hai? Sabse zaroori hoga ki aap unse pyar aur vishawas ke saath iski vajeh poochein, bina jhagda, bina aalochna. Tab hee aap anumaan laga saktey hain, hain na? Yeh bhi yaad rakhiye, ki sex mein HAAN karna ya NAA, yeh bhi unka haq hai, unka nirnay… so yadi who Na kartee hain, so ek baat to tay hi ki koi bhi zor ya zabardasti bilkul allow nahin ha, samjhe beta jee?! https://lovematters.in/en/news/my-wife-not-interested-sex zara yeh bhi padhiye : http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/making-love https://lovematters.in/hi/news/how-can-i-please-my-wife-bed
Mam Meri Wife 1 month se pregnent hai maine uske pregnent ke baad kai baar usse sex kar chuka hu usse mere bache ko koi asar to nahi hoga
Suniye Shuru se third month tak aur phir saatvein mahene se le kar …. Is samy avoid keejiye. Jo wife ko pasansd ho who hee keejiye , jo doctor salaah de who bhi samjh leejiye. Aur dekho bête behtar hoga ki aap condom ka isltemal karein. Ya phir discharge andar NA hone dein. Iske ilava wife ki comfort ka poora dhyaan keejiye.Aur haan! last 3 months mein definitely safety rakhiye. https://lovematters.in/hi/news/sex-during-pregnancy-top-five-facts
zaid nawab
Sun, 07/12/2015 - 06:13
Aunti ji mera ling 10.3 inch ka hai or mota bh bht hai aurat to bht enjoy krti sex mere sath but me 16 ki gf ke sath karna chahta hu par wo dekh kr darti hai or sirf hath se mujhe discharge karti hai..kaise manaun?
Bilkul nahi kar sakte kyunki 18 saal se kam umar ki ladki ke saath kiya gaya sex phir chahe who uski marzi se hi kyun na ho RAPE ki category mein aata hai. Isliye aisa sochne wale viyakti ko khud apna chitna karna chahiye aur netik anetik baton par bhi vichar karna chahiye.
Bete yeh ek bohot badi mithya hai ki bahar ejaculation kaarne ke baad pregnancy ke chances nahi hote hain. Jabki pregnancy ke liye ek shukranu bhi bohot kaafi hai.Zara yeh padhiye: https://lovematters.in/hi/news/withdrawal-myths-busted
Bete yadi shareer menin uttejna adhik hogi, sex ki bhavna zyada hogi toh sheeghr patan hone ki sambhavna bhi adhik hee hogee. aisee stithi mein, partner par focus badhana, foreplay , yaani bête ki pravesh karne se pehle bahut se alag alag kriyaein karna , jinse dono ko aanand mile, apne partner kee uttejna badhana, yeh sab activitys sabse zaroori hain. iske ilava, partner ke saath sex karne se pehle, ek baar hast maithun kar saktey hain, utne samay pehele jitne mein ling mein tanaav aa jaaye. Condom ka istemaal bhi jaldi discharge mein help karta hai. http://lovematters.in/hi/news/premature-ejaculation-top-five-facts
Beta Rahila! Yadi jis viykati ke saath aap unsafe sex kar rahe hain use HIV hai toh HIV hone ki sambhavna hai. Duniya bhar mein sabse adhik HIV casess, sex ke zariye hue hain.Lekin HIV aur bhi kai asurakshit karano se hota hai.So! Zara detail mein yeh niche diya hua link padhiye: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/hiv
ling ka size bada karnay ka koi bhi tarika mojjud nahi hai. Ling ke size ki sahi jaankari yaha se hasil karo aap : http://lovematters.in/en/resource/penis-shapes-and-sizes Aur Please size par mat jao, apna andaaz achcha karo- unke saath timing bitho theek hai.All the best.
Zaid nawab
Fri, 08/28/2015 - 19:11
Aunti ji agar first sex se pehle me ye janna chahu ki meri biwi ne kisi ke sath pehle kuch kiya hai ya nahi to pakka pakka kaise pata chalega. Jaise doctor rap pidit ko kaise dekhte hai?
Hmmm! Suniye zara Kaumarya ka poora daromadaar hymen ya jhilli se juda hua hai. Yaad rakhiye ki yeh bahut hee asani se toot saktee hai, jese cycling, horse riding ya khel-kud ke duran. isliye jab tak mahila khud nahi batyegi ki woh pehli baar hi sex kar rahi hain aap is baat ka pata nahi laga saktay. Waise bhi isse koi phark nahin padta, yadi pyaar karte hain toh vishwaas bhi keejiye..apnay mann se doubt clear kijiye aur yeh padhiye: http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/faqs-hymen-and-virginity
Thanks for another informative blog. The place else may I get that kind of info written in such an ideal approach? I have a challenge that I'm simply now running on, and I have been at the glance out for such information.
Amara Smith
Mon, 05/20/2019 - 12:19
very great blog extremely thank you so much for share this post. It's information very very helpful for pregnancy woman's health and sexual power. Being intimate can be important after having a baby. With everything revolving around the child, a relationship can get neglected. A bit of intimacy at the right time can help prevent. buymyviagra.com
Add new comment

Comment

  • Allowed HTML tags: <a href hreflang>