Auntyji
thingkreations

My parents won't accept her caste - now what?

By Auntyji Tuesday, April 9, 2013 - 16:32
I am in love with a girl who belongs to a lower caste. We really love each other but my parents will never approve our marriage. I am even scared to bring up this topic with them. I need your help Auntyji. Dipesh, Ghaziabad

Auntyji says… Jab pyar kia to darna kya. Pyar kia koi chori nahin ki, chup chup aahein bharna kya.

Dipesh puttar, I’m very sure you’ve heard this one before. Now don’t think that I’m making light of the situation that you’re in. I totally understand that you are going through a bad phase. The die-hard romantic that your aunty is, this one has always been her favorite song. Mind you it is not just a song for me, it is a principle that I proudly stand by.

Talk to them

Now I am assuming that you don’t care about castes or any such things. And you shouldn’t either. It’s something silly that the society has created around us, and needs to be defied, in my rather humble opinion. And I am 100 per cent with you. And maybe so are your parents. Dipesh puttar, no matter how strict your parents are, they’re still your parents. Try and talk to them. Tell them how much you love this girl and that you want to marry her. No harm in trying. And who knows you just might convince them. After all, no parents want their children to be unhappy.

Take a stand

So wear your Nike sneakers and just do it. Your parents should understand that the times have changed. Caste and class no longer define people and their lives. However, if they don’t agree with you then let's get back to the drawing board. Betaji, if you are very sure about spending your life with this girl, then you’ll have to take a stand. I know it will be very hard for you to go against their wishes but such is life. I always tell all my children that if you must take a stand on something, then do it sooner rather than later. If you spend too much time humming and ha-ing, things will just slip away.

Ruined marriages

Now let me tell you the story of my niece who was madly in love with this boy and wanted to marry him. But her boyfriend was sure that his family wouldn’t approve of the match, so he never talked to them. Eventually, my niece and that boy got married to different people. But they still think about what if they had stayed together. I don’t want you to spend your life with that regret. Needless to say, both of them were very unhappy in their marriages. The boy’s wife filed for divorce on grounds of impotency because they didn’t consummate their marriage even after a year. After that, he realized his mistake, and then he was hell-bent to fix it. He convinced my niece to leave her husband and marry him. It took them time and two ruined marriages to really figure out what was best for them.

Believe in yourself

Dipesh puttar, I’m not saying that this is true for every case. But the key is if you are sure about something stand up for it when the time is right. It might not be very easy but believe me it will be the best possible way to do it. Believe in yourself and have faith, I am sure everything will work out. Signing off on another romantic note. Ae Mere humsafar, Ek Zara Intezaar sun Sadaayein De Rahi Hain Manzil Pyaar Ki…

To protect the identity, the person in the picture is a model and names have been changed. 

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Comments
Am in love wit a guy since 5 yrs.we both love each other madly.but we differ in csstes.that wasnt a problem for both of us before.but all of a sudden his parents told him that if we both get into marriage that might ruin our life.he got stuck in this and now his mind filled wid negatve thoughts.he is saying that if we dont b happy wit our marriage wats d point in marrying.plss help me.give me a suggestion
Anonymous
Tue, 04/09/2013 - 18:40
i am Aman from lucknow i am 16 and i feel very very attracted to my English teacher its because i had been preparing with her for a programme to be held in school and working along with her for hours after school.And since then i had been masturbating frequently.What to do ?
Anonymous
Tue, 04/09/2013 - 18:51
I am T***** from Delhi, I am 17 I am very much attracted to my teacher she is 40+ but still I like it has been because I had been working with for hours after school her for a programme to be held(one year back).I had been masturbating on her since one year.What to do ?
Hey... I m jenny I loved a boy n he loved me too bt because of intr caste he broke up wid me saying his parnts wil neva agree so btr v brke up.. What should I do should I convnce him or leave him coz he don't evn want to try..??
Mera naam Shalu hai mein ek ladke se bahut pyar karti hu vo jaat hain or mein jatav.meri family tyar hai unse shadi ke liye lekin unki family mujhai apnane se inkar kar rahi hai ladke ke mata pita hu aro shaadi ke khilaf hai.humare bich sab kuch ho chuka hai or ladka bhi apne ghar valo se darta hai vo bahut strick hai kabhi nahi manenge aise mein kya karu kaise vo apne ghar valo ko manaye mein bhi chahti hu ki mein ek family mein rahu unko unke mummy papa se dur nahi karna chahti hu answer me
Bete Shalu, agar aapki family is shadi ke liye ready hain, toh unse kahiye ki wo ladke ki family se jakar unse baat karen - unhe sari baaten spasht aur clear roop se batayen - unhe samjhane ki koshish karen. Aap dono ke relation ke baare mein sari baaten spasht batayen, OK!! Shayad kuchh baat ban jaye, Aapko hamari ore se best of luck!! https://lovematters.in/hi/marriage/thinking-about-marriage/love-marriages Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Mera bf meri cast ka nhi hai lekin mai usse bahut karti hu lekin mere bhaiya ne ham dono ka baat karna band kar diya ab mai kya karu please help me
Bete thik hai aap kisi other caste ke ladke se pyar karti hain, lekin kya aap apne ghar waalon se Jujh sakenegi? Kay aap dono saamna kar payenge … kal aapki mataji ne koi aisa kadam utha leeya ya unke yahan kisi ne kuch kar leeya so kya aap log in sab haadson ko deal kar sakenege? Beta, yeh namumkin nahin lekin bahut hee mushkil hai. Aur virodh toh shuru bhi ho chuka hai aapke bhaiya ka.. Please koi bhi kadam uthane se pehle - jis mein caste, dharam, age, parents ka virodh jaisee stithi saamne aa rahee ho- apni family aur apne lawyer / vakeel/ local police thaane,aas-paas koi NGO se apne haq aur adhikaron ke baare mein poori jaankari lein. Yadi koi kadam uthate hain - to uske kya parinaam kya ho sakte hain - sab pooch leejiye aur aapko aur family ko kiss-kiss stithi ke liye tayyar rehna hai - uski poori knowledge le leejiye. Ise padhiye: https://lovematters.in/en/news/inter-caste-marriages-top-five-facts https://lovematters.in/en/love-and-relationships/parents-vs-partner-who-would-you-pick Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
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