Husband does not use condom
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My husband doesn’t want to use a condom, help!

By Auntyji Wednesday, January 29, 2020 - 14:38
Hi Auntyji, my husband says he doesn't enjoy sex with condom. I don't want to have birth control pills. What should we do? Supriya, 24, Chandigarh.

Auntyji says, ‘Oh ho – this is a difficult situation; whose rights are more right!’ 

Options – not galore

Beta Supriya – the good news is you both are talking safer sex and contraception. The not so good news is – it’s going to two different directions! Hunn what to do? 

While there is a case made for condoms not being pleasurable – quite debate worthy that argument as well. Well, many men do feel so and so do women. Maybe they have not found their best condoms yet. So chalo – let’s agree for a while haan jee,  it’s not as much fun. So then what’s the other option for men? None basically. 

So if condoms are no fun, it shifts the entire onus on one party – you – women! 

Responsibility demands 

And you don’t want to use pills – they are hormonal – they have effects – some not so good and some really very good. 

Same applies for most of the other tools left for women – contraceptive injection etc – they are inside your body, they are largely hormonal and they need some managing. The results are very good no doubt –  but again – it’s all acting out in your body– and being managed by your body – i.e you. 

And if you don’t feel comfortable about things happening inside your body, then we must bring the best condoms back to the table. Aur unko dekhne ka nazariya!

Sex it up!

There is a lot of fun information out there about condom use. Condoms are now sexy and fun, playful and colourful, even tasty and fragrant. 

Check out our article on how condoms can be made fun and. For example, he needn’t wear one at the very onset of your love making – that can come only before penetration does – take time over foreplay and a jiffy break to get the condom on – will help him last longer too! Now how’s that for a sales pitch! 

Do the research and present the ‘all-new best condoms’ to the husband. Spruce them up – dress them up and talk them up and tempt him to get online or the store and buy them ek dum jhatpat

For love’s sake

To somewhat reduce the pressure on condoms, puttar ji, smarten up your usual sex routine. Make it spicy! Use lubes, use sex toys, use your imagination – again a huge range out there. 

And if you are still facing some struggle, remind the husband that while pills and other women contraceptives are great – they are invasive (enter the body) and more than anything – you are not ready – yet – to go down that path. Should that not be a consideration for him? He loves your body – well let him show it some respect too! Kya bolti tu

*To protect the identity, names have been changed. 

What flavours of condoms do you use? What are your best condoms? Comment below or share with Love Matters (LM) on our Facebook page. If you have a specific question, please ask LM experts on our discussion forum

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