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He does not wear a condom? Sexy tips to help

Here are some of the most used excuses by men to not wear condoms and we have some best answers to help you negotiate and answer your queries on how to wear condoms.

1. Your partner says: "You don’t trust me."

"If you really loved me, you would trust me enough not to want to use a condom."

You can say: "I can enjoy sex more if I know we’re both protected from pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. It’s not about trust, it’s about peace of mind."

"I do, but I’m not risking my life to prove it to you. Instead I’d like to have some hot sex!"

"If you really loved me, you’d help us protect ourselves."

2. Your partner says: "It’s uncomfortable."

"It doesn’t fit properly."

"It comes off during sex."

You can say: "Let’s try a different brand or size. Let's find your best condom! I heard that certain brands fit better than others."

3. Your partner says: "Wearing a condom puts me out of the mood." "I do not know how to wear condoms properly". 

You can say: "Why don’t we try something sexy with a condom, like say I can put one on using my mouth. (Check out Tips for putting on male condoms.)"

"Having unsafe sex can put you out of the mood for good!" 

4. Your partner says: "I’ll pull out in time."

You can say: "Even if you do, I can still get pregnant. One little sperm is all it takes. Who knows your sperm could be super potent!"

"Even if you do, I could get a sexually transmitted disease from your pre-come."

5. Your partner says: "It doesn’t feel as good with a condom." "I don't know how to wear condoms." 

"I won’t enjoy sex if we use a condom because there’s no skin-to-skin contact."

You can say: "I’ll enjoy sex if it’s safe. Anyway, I heard there are great ways to make it feel like skin to skin. We could try putting an extra bit of lubricant on the inside of the condom, so you’ll get this extra sensitive feeling on the tip of your penis."

"If you use a female condom or a condom made out of polyurethane with lubricant, you’ll be able to get that great skin-to-skin feeling because polyurethane can transmit body heat."

"I feel more relaxed knowing we’re safe. And if I’m more relaxed, we can have more fun together! Let's find your best condom!"

6. Your partner says: "I don’t have one on me." 'Don't know how to wear condoms."

"I don’t know how to put one on."

You can say: "Here, let me show you!"

7. Your partner says: "I’m allergic to latex condoms"

You can say: "We can buy ones made out of polyurethane! They even feel more natural than latex. And if we add a bit of water-based lubricant, you’ll be able to feel my body heat too!"

8. Your partner says: "You’re on the pill, so why would you need to use a condom?"

You can say: "Well if we use a condom with the pill, we can be even safer because they pill isn’t 100 percent effective against pregnancy. Also, wearing a condom can help protect us from infections that we don’t even know we’ve got. Didn't you know - it's called 'Double Dutch!'"

9. Your partner says: "Putting it on interrupts the mood"

You can say: "Not, if I help put it on… I can make it worth your while!"

Read more tips below to make a man wear a condom in a sexy way! 

Put it on with your mouth

Put the best condom in your mouth, gently suck on the condom tip (teat) between your teeth, put the condom over the end of the penis in your mouth, then take the penis into your mouth to roll the condom down it. Try licking the condom all the way down.

If you want some extra practise before doing this on him, try practising on a cucumber or a dildo. This is a good technique to use if he says that wearing condoms or putting them on is awkward.

Give him the green light

Think of ripping open a condom packet as a ‘green light’ for sex. Taking a condom packet out and confidently ripping it open is a sexy way to show your partner that you’re ready for some penetrative action.

Use this on your partner especially if he’s not keen on the idea of using a condom. And add a bit of water-based lubricant on the inside of the condom so it slides on easily – not too much though, or the condom could slip off.

Tease him

Slowly slide a condom on him, gently caressing his penis, testicles or anus. To add some variation, ask him to put on a condom and show you how he likes to be touched. Let him know it turns you on.

Use thin condoms for a skin-to-skin feeling

Thinner condoms are no more likely to break than thicker or regular condoms when you’re having sex, even if you’re having anal sex. So to feel extra close, try using some thinner ones next time. This is a good option if you and your partner want to feel even closer during sex.

Messy is sexy

If you like sex that’s messy, and watching your partner come, get him to pull out before he ejaculates. He can take off the condom and come all over your chest, breasts or back. 

Think of some opening lines, and work out some responses ahead of time if you think your partner might object to using a condom. Here are some of the most used excuses by men to not wear condoms and we have some best answers to help you negotiate. 

Have questions on best condoms? Want to know how to wear condoms? Please ask Love Matters (LM) experts on our discussion forum. Don't forget to check out our Facebook  page.  

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