Can I lose my virginity if I use a menstrual cup or tampon?
Love Matters India

Can I lose my virginity if I use a menstrual cup or tampon?

By Auntyji Wednesday, July 10, 2024 - 15:59
Hello Aunty, I've read about the side effects of sanitary napkins and I'm considering using a menstrual cup instead. However, I'm scared it might affect my virginity. Komal, 25 years, Jaipur

Aunty ji explains-

Komal beta, I was a little disappointed after reading your question. No, no, not because of you but because of the thinking of the society that even today people believe in the virginity of girls, the hymen of the vagina etc., while the truth is something else. But, it's okay. I am here to answer all your questions because there is nothing to worry about!

Now let's talk about your problem. So, Komal beta, you are absolutely right that some research shows that using sanitary pads can be harmful but it is also true that the way people have been made aware about sanitary pads, we cannot ignore it. Perhaps this is the reason that people have become very comfortable with sanitary pads now, but they are made of plastic, right?

Addicted to sanitary pads

You are right that menstrual cups should be used but it may still be difficult for many girls to use it because they have already developed a habit of sanitary pads and it is a habit that will go away. Do you remember an advertisement - Daag hai, jate-jate hi jayega… So this pad also has a similar habit.

If you want to use sanitary pads because of many doubts in your mind, then it is fine but if you want, you can buy some safe pads that do not have chemicals. Like - pads made of cloth because there are no chemicals in it and it can be used after washing it again and again. Yes, I agree puttar, it may be a little difficult to wash it but – it is our own blood! So we have to clean it, right! And if you are thinking of using a menstrual cup, then that too it will have to be washed.

Virginity in a cup?

Now beta ji, let me tell you one thing that many girls are not able to use a menstrual cup even if they want to because most of them have the same thinking. They think that it will break their virginity! Or the size of the vagina will increase and it will become loose.

Ab aap hi bataye, hm kya karein? Sorry-sorry beta ji, I remembered a song because I thought that this song must be going on in your mind but the reality is that even today people ask - If the hymen breaks, then what will my husband say, what will people say etc.

This is why people are not becoming aware of menstrual cups, and the sanitary pad industry continues to thrive. But tell me one thing - is virginity only considered for girls? What about boys?

The Ghost of Virginity!

In fact, beta ji, virginity is considered to be an issue only for girls and there is a general misconception that it is related to the vagina. It is also believed that it involves the penetration of the penis into the vagina as it breaks the hymen of the woman and breaks her virginity - the same age-old mindset.

And puttar, this is where we fall. If we talk only about 'definitions', which can be different for different people, then a person who has not had any sexual experience is a virgin. But has anyone ever heard a man say that 'I put my most precious thing at stake for you'! Hey, we are not talking about an iPhone!

For a long time, Virginity has been associated only with a woman and her hymen breaking, and unfortunately this is the biggest myth associated with virginity! Beta, do you know that there are many women who do not have a hymen and some have it broken while riding a bicycle or while playing sports!

And beta ji, the hymen is not a seal which has to be broken for the male penis to enter. It is just skin around the inside of the vagina. Think about it: if there was a seal, how would periods happen? How would the blood flow out during menstruation?

No proof needed

I think you must be saying that all that is fine, Aunty Ji, but tell me whether I will remain a virgin after using a menstrual cup or tampon or not. That is what I'm telling you, beta—virginity cannot be broken by any kind of sanitary product because virginity isn’t defined by a layer of tissue or skin fold! It is about how you see yourself and what you think about yourself.

If you feel that by not using a menstrual cup or tampon you are preserving your virginity, then it is a matter of personal choice and decision.

Till date, I haven't understood why there's so much debate about virginity. Someone should explain this to Aunty Ji! We girls don't need any labels, so don't take it so seriously.

Money matters

Let me tell you one thing, Komal beta, if there's a sale somewhere, it's fun, isn't it? I love buying good clothes for myself without compromising on quality, and I really enjoy sale days! Now, if we buy a menstrual cup, it lasts for at least two to three years. This means we are free from buying the same item again and again.

Along with this, a menstrual cup is also eco-friendly because, unlike pads, there's no need to worry about disposal again and again! And you don't have to change it frequently due to wetness, as a menstrual cup can collect blood for about 10-12 hours, though this can vary depending on your period flow.

Apart from this, beta ji, you can buy a menstrual cup and keep it at home so that when you see it, you might feel inclined to try it. Keep in mind, puttar, that when buying a menstrual cup, it's important to read about its quality carefully. Learn how to clean it, as typically, a menstrual cup is washed with lukewarm water. If you want, you can also add some antiseptic to reduce the risk of infection.

Stop worrying about virginity

Komal beta, if you come to know later that sanitary pads are very harmful or suppose sanitary pads are not available and girls have to use menstrual cups, would you worry about virginity? Think of it this way: if your mother or you had started using menstrual cups without any concerns, would you be worried today that you are not a virgin or that your virginity is broken? No, right?

So why worry so much about this right now? If there is a good person who loves you, then he will love only you, not your virginity and yes, do not suppress your mind at all, rather when you feel comfortable, start using menstrual cups because why should we compromise with our life or our feelings because of what someone thinks about us? Hum this song- Mujhe kya parwah ki duniya ki…. and yes, you should also read the stories of these girls who are telling the stories of menstruation.

 

 

Have a story/question? Share with Love Matters (LM) on our Facebook page. If you have a specific question ask us in our Inboxes. We are also on Instagram, YouTube and Twitter. 

Did you find this useful?

Comments
Add new comment

Comment

  • Allowed HTML tags: <a href hreflang>