Love Matters
My girlfriend talks to another guy – should I be jealous?
Auntyji says… Wah wah wah, what a true love story! Isse kehtey hain, new age Romeo! Dude, you are too much...
For a good reason?
In a nutshell, what Auntyji wants to say is, “Oye Gurinder, are you mad, oye?” On one hand you are claiming to love your girlfriend and on the other you can’t deal with her talking to another guy. Your love has no firm footing or what? Who are you doubting, her or your own self?
Betaji, aye vee koi gall hui? Chalo, let us say for your sake that she is ’engaging’ with another guy. So avval toh, how do you know they are not really just good friends? Have you got any reason to doubt her or mistrust her?
Self-check – one, two and three!
Firstly, check what’s giving you this impression? Are you sure you are not being the usual old, boring, jealous type of a man? Are you sure you are not out to “reform” her? First check your own reasons. Why are you not comfortable with her and this guy? Or are you not ok with her and any guy?
Actually herein lies the answer. Gurinder! Sunn, it’s never going to be possible that your girlfriend or partner does not speak to anyone of another gender. If you don’t like the feeling of one guy your partner hangs out with, engages with, just that one guy or girl, maybe there is something wrong there. But if it happens with any and every boy your partner talks to, then clearly dude, the problem is yours and yours alone. I hope that’s not what you are doing, are you?
On two boats
You are young. You meet and interact, work and hang out with all sorts of people, different genders. What’s so wrong with that? That’s what you have wanted all the while, right? That’s what you like and have been demanding all these years. Why are you getting all old-fashioned now?
Why are you being the critic of the “zamaaana” you make so much fun of? Ab kahan gayee progressive thinking? Hahahaha, bhai bada mazaa aa raha hai tumahri Aunty ko. To see you guys so edgy when you can’t handle the demands of modern day living.
You jeer at small town folks and middle class morality. Now suddenly, you are what you have been so against all these young years of your life? Kya hua? Can’t handle democracy, can’t handle modernity? You look for smart, sassy partners, but when it comes to being the modern day lover, what’s going wrong? Establishing yourselves as equals, now you are just a jealous old fashioned film star?
Clearly and surely
On the other hand, yes, you may be right. She may be keen on a guy. It means she is over you and wants to get on. All very possible, beta. Spot what is strengthening your belief apart from plain envy! Does she behave different, act funny, kind of ‘sexy and cute’? Does she hide information from you? Have you read or heard anything? Does her tone, behaviour change whilst talking to the other guy?
Beta, ask her directly but before that make a mental list of what all you have noted. She may deny the entire thing, but continue to tell her your feelings about this one guy and why! If she assures you that she is only pals with him, that’s ok then. Forget everything and get on with your love story.
Remember, whatever you do, don’t go sleuthing in her bag, mobile or computer for clues. Sure you have more class than that! And if she is dallying with another guy and wants to hide it from you, well this relationship not going too far or long, is it? But till you know for sure, don’t give up on love and keep the faith!
To protect the author’s privacy, the person in the picture is a model.
Are you also jealous of your partner spending time with someone else? Write your experiences as a comment below or via Facebook.
Auntyji says… Wah wah wah, what a true love story! Isse kehtey hain, new age Romeo! Dude, you are too much...
For a good reason?
In a nutshell, what Auntyji wants to say is, “Oye Gurinder, are you mad, oye?” On one hand you are claiming to love your girlfriend and on the other you can’t deal with her talking to another guy. Your love has no firm footing or what? Who are you doubting, her or your own self?
Betaji, aye vee koi gall hui? Chalo, let us say for your sake that she is ’engaging’ with another guy. So avval toh, how do you know they are not really just good friends? Have you got any reason to doubt her or mistrust her?
Self-check – one, two and three!
Firstly, check what’s giving you this impression? Are you sure you are not being the usual old, boring, jealous type of a man? Are you sure you are not out to “reform” her? First check your own reasons. Why are you not comfortable with her and this guy? Or are you not ok with her and any guy?
Actually herein lies the answer. Gurinder! Sunn, it’s never going to be possible that your girlfriend or partner does not speak to anyone of another gender. If you don’t like the feeling of one guy your partner hangs out with, engages with, just that one guy or girl, maybe there is something wrong there. But if it happens with any and every boy your partner talks to, then clearly dude, the problem is yours and yours alone. I hope that’s not what you are doing, are you?
On two boats
You are young. You meet and interact, work and hang out with all sorts of people, different genders. What’s so wrong with that? That’s what you have wanted all the while, right? That’s what you like and have been demanding all these years. Why are you getting all old-fashioned now?
Why are you being the critic of the “zamaaana” you make so much fun of? Ab kahan gayee progressive thinking? Hahahaha, bhai bada mazaa aa raha hai tumahri Aunty ko. To see you guys so edgy when you can’t handle the demands of modern day living.
You jeer at small town folks and middle class morality. Now suddenly, you are what you have been so against all these young years of your life? Kya hua? Can’t handle democracy, can’t handle modernity? You look for smart, sassy partners, but when it comes to being the modern day lover, what’s going wrong? Establishing yourselves as equals, now you are just a jealous old fashioned film star?
Clearly and surely
On the other hand, yes, you may be right. She may be keen on a guy. It means she is over you and wants to get on. All very possible, beta. Spot what is strengthening your belief apart from plain envy! Does she behave different, act funny, kind of ‘sexy and cute’? Does she hide information from you? Have you read or heard anything? Does her tone, behaviour change whilst talking to the other guy?
Beta, ask her directly but before that make a mental list of what all you have noted. She may deny the entire thing, but continue to tell her your feelings about this one guy and why! If she assures you that she is only pals with him, that’s ok then. Forget everything and get on with your love story.
Remember, whatever you do, don’t go sleuthing in her bag, mobile or computer for clues. Sure you have more class than that! And if she is dallying with another guy and wants to hide it from you, well this relationship not going too far or long, is it? But till you know for sure, don’t give up on love and keep the faith!
To protect the author’s privacy, the person in the picture is a model.
Are you also jealous of your partner spending time with someone else? Write your experiences as a comment below or via Facebook.