Couple flirting over a glass of wine

Flirting for sex will get you nowhere

Coming on strong might not be the best approach to flirting. Girls find dominant guys less attractive, a British study found. Leaving a good impression on the person you’re flirting with has more to do with your motives for flirting, researchers say.

If a guy is flirting just to get sex, girls view him as more dominant than someone whose motive is to start an intimate relationship.

The catch is that being dominant is not seen as a good thing by women. Dominant flirters are rated as less physically and socially attractive and less effective during conversations.

Flirting for fun or sex

Guys who flirt just to have a good time are also out of luck. Flirting for the fun of it actually lowers a guys physical attractiveness in the eyes of girls.


Flirting for sex has the opposite effect of increasing a girl’s physical attractiveness in the eyes of guys, the study found. When women are after an intimate relationship or if they’re just flirting for the fun of it, guys regard them as being better conversationalists.

The trustworthy flirt

Girls who come across in a friendly and sincere manner when flirting leave the best impression. Guys find them to be more physically and socially attractive and better conversationalists.

The data shows what most people know - sincerity, trustworthiness and consideration are good ways of showing how much you value the person you’re flirting with.


According to researchers, these behaviours create a positive and likeable impression – and that holds true for both men and women.

Did you find this useful?

Add new comment


  • Allowed HTML tags: <a href hreflang>