Auntyji Love Matters
Love Matters

When can we have sex after her abortion?

By Auntyji Tuesday, September 15, 2020 - 07:24
My girlfriend just had an abortion. I want to know in how many days she may be able to conceive again. Also, I am feeling kind of upset about the whole thing... so help me out here, please. Ishaan (23), Lucknow.

Auntyji says… Oh ho beta, why don’t you people exercise basic safety... This is never easy, you know. I hope she is relaxed and healthy already?

So going by the fact that you are still dating and do not want your girlfriend to get pregnant again, here goes. Since we don’t know when her cycle is going to resume, she is at risk of a pregnancy anytime now onwards. Don’t wait for her next regular period to decide if she can conceive, she may well even before, so be ever so careful.

It may seem as if I am trying to scare you or frighten you. Neither of the two beta, not at all. But yes I am trying to ensure you keep yourself and your girlfriend safe and secure now onward.

Running the risk

Wasie beta jee, sex is fun, and let’s face it, to many of us, unsafe sex seems to be even more fun, more exciting! Lekin jee, look at the consequences! Oye hoye!

I am pretty sure the two of you must have gone through some hours and days of tension and stress about what was going to happen and how and where is a good choice, what if someone comes to know.... Oh dear God, kyun? Dasso?

It is very difficult! So beta, I ask again, sure, sex may seem like more fun when unsafe and risky, but is it worth the possible ramifications? Dasso hun Maharaj?

Safe, affordable, accessible

Even though abortion is legal in our country since 1971 – which by the way is a very  early, progressive step – many, many countries are still dealing with how and whether to make abortion legal. Despite being legal, it is still quite difficult to access safe and affordable abortion services in our country.

Oopar se the social stigma does not help, even though abortion is fairly common in this country. Abortion is every woman’s right and so is easy access, affordability and safety.

It is her body and she has the right to decide when she wants a child, if she wants it and who she wants to rear it with, bas ho gayee gall khatam! But it comes with a fair share of responsibility too…

Smart, sexy and safe

Now this is for the ladies, but the gentlemen must also read on... Kudiyon suno, there is an added responsibility for you! Body is yours, right is yours, theek hai. You better remember that when you are so madly in love (and in lust), you have a right to say yes to sex and no to sex whenever you want, even to the same person!

You have a right to say yes to a kind of sex and no to another type of sex. You have the right to do it whenever, whatever time of day or night, whichever place in the house you want or not. And you also get to decide with whom you want it and with whom you don’t... sab theek theek hai!

But beta body is yours, na? Do you not have a responsibility towards your body too? Hain kudiye? So beta, if you can say yes and no to so many variables, why can’t you do the same for safer sex, for condoms? He has to just “ask nicely” and off go the condoms, maybe even before off goes the light or on comes the light! Aye haye mohabbat! Or should I say, aye haye nee kamlee!

Humble request?

Now you there, Ishaan, you said you are feeling upset? Kis liye? Ok you don’t know yet. Theek hai. So you too are upset, maybe you are feeling a bit burdened – she did not get pregnant on her own na? And was it you who was busy hiding the condoms?

I hope this was not your “Valentine’s Day gift request”? Hain khoteya? Puttar jee, whatever has happened has happened in her body, no doubt, but if she is pregnant, you are equally if not more, responsible, samjheyo?

If you requested, cajoled, blackmailed her – then toh even more so. She, of course was being a jhalli, what happened to you? And now you are feeling bad, of course you should. Itna hee kar le and be very careful now on. Beta, this is not an easy time for anyone.

Chal bass hunn, take good care of her and make her and all her gal pals read this as well. And all of you try, no, ensure that you do not get pregnant until the time you both are fully ready and capable of handling a baby!

To protect the author's privacy, the person in the photo is a model. This article was first published on March 17, 2015. 

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Comments
saniya khan
Mon, 05/25/2015 - 13:04
aunty ji mera naam saniya hai or meri age 19 years hai or me married hu meri shadi ko 1 year hua h abhi or ab hame baby chahiye magar me ab tak pregnant nahi hui pata nahi q to plz aap mujhe bataiye k mujhe qya krna chahiye hmmm sex krte hai magar fir bhi
Bete waise apki shadi ko kuch jyada samye hua nahi hai.Aur phir abhi aap umar ke hisaab se kuch jyada nahi hain. So bete yeh samye toh ek dusre ko samjhne ka hota hai ek life time ki understanding banane ka hota hai. Acha kya aap abhi tak kisi doctor se millein hai is bare mein? Ek vishagya ya achche panjikrit doctor se mililye zara aap aur Jaldi pregnancy ke tips yaha pahdiye: http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/tips
Hey..aunty...am ullas am 19....and a not able to recognise am gay or straight...and if see guys I will be in mood..plzz tell me how to become straight..am dipressed from dis aunty
Dear Ullas, it's okay to be confused. You can always explore your boundaries. Even if you are gay, what's wrong in it? You are not the first person to feel this way. Just be careful, always, ALWAYS use a condom and don't get intimate or romantic at any place that may not go well for you. You are not alone, find a support group, your city must have one, too. Relax!!
Ohhh! Ab kya sthithi hai? Suno jaldi kisi vishagya ya achche panjikrit doctor se milo aur dekho kya ho sakta hai, agar jyada time nahi hua hoga to aap MTP ki maang kar saktey hain. Kisi neem hakeem ya chemist ke paas mat pahuch jaana, DOCTOR ONLY!! Iske alawa aap FPAI clinic se sampark kar sakety hai jiski jaankari aaapko iski website pe mil jayegi. http://www.fpaindia.org/ http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/unplanned-pregnancy
बेटा पहले तो doctor से मिलकर ये निश्चिन्त कर लो कि यदि सब ठीक है तो कुछ सावधानीयो का इस्तेमाल करते हुए आप sex कर सकते है, लेकिन जब आपकी बीबी तैयार feel करे, ready हो कोई दर्द या तकलीफ में ना हो… और हाँ precaution के लिए कंडोम का इस्तेमाल बहुत ज़रूरी है क्यूंकि याद रखिये कि वो कभी भी pregnant हो सकती हैं. इसे पढ़ लीजिये: https://lovematters.in/hi/news/sex-after-abortion-when यदि इस मुद्दे पर आप और गहरी चर्चा में जुड़ना चाहते हैं, तो हमारे डिस्कशन बोर्ड, " जस्ट पूछो" में ज़रूर शामिल हों. https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Auntiji..my wife is having irregular period..she had regular period for a long time..but last month it's came on 31st day..this today is 32nd day but not having the period..we have safe sex..only roleplay.y she is missing her periods
Relax, mr. Sanjay. Periods get late sometimes due to stress and other reasons. Wait for a few days and consult a specialist or registered doctor if the situation doesn't resolve itself. If you would like to join in on a further discussion on this topic, join our discussion board, "Just Ask” https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Aunti ji mai22saal ka huu or Karib 6saalo se hastmaithun karta huu Lekin mai healthy huu or body par koi side effects nahi hai.. Kaya shadi bad sex life me problem ho sakti hai....
Relax, beta. Aapko hastmaithun ke kaaran koi probelm nahi aayegi.Hastmaithun ek safe/surakshit tareeka hai apni santushti karne ka. Isse koi nuksaan ya beemari nahin hoti. Yadi chahein toh bahut see activities hain, jinmein aap samya bitaa sakte hain. Jaise ki khel – games, gym ya koi hobbies…ok? Yeh bhi padhiye: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/men-masturbating https://lovematters.in/en/news/i-could-masturbate-anytime-anywhere Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Aunty ji mai unmarried hu.av 26april ko mera abortionhua or bleeding halka halka jakr 10 mayko khatm hue h...bt 15 may ko hmme unprotected sex kiya.bt mere bf n bahar ejaculate kiya.fir v m unwanted 72 use kr li thi 19 ghante k andar.to kya for v pregnancy k chance h...av nhi chahti mai kya key.mera med iCal abortion hua tha.
Ruby bete yeh ek bohot badi mithya hai ki sperm bahar nikalne se garbhdharn nahi hota hai kyunki pregnant hone ke liye ek shukranu bhi bohot kaafi hota hai. Lekin aapne Unwanted 72 goli le lee hai toh is goli ko lene ke baad pregnancy ke chances bahut kam ya na ke barabar rah jate hai. Unwanted ek emergency goli hai jo ki unsafe sex ke 72 ghanton ke andar hee lee jaati hai, lekin yeh mahila ke masik dharm par asar kar saktee hai. PLEASE in goliyon ko laparvahi se istemaal mat keejiye. Safe sex ke liye condom ka istemal kiya jaata hai naa ki emergency pills ka bete, yaha padhiye zara: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/safe-sex https://lovematters.in/hi/birth-control/top-10-facts-about-emergency-contraceptive-pills Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
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