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Dating a colleague: do’s and don’ts

Most of us spend more time at the office than at home. So it's no surprise that people fall in love between staplers and the printer. But how should you handle a romance without alienating your colleagues or neglecting your job?

Do...

… Be discreet
Even if you are head over heels in love and you want to do nothing but kiss and cuddle your partner, keep in mind that it might make your other colleagues uncomfortable. And it could also make you seem very unprofessional. So while a quick hug and kiss in the morning can be okay, keep anything more intimate for your free time. If in doubt, it's better to not show any affection at all; it might save you lots of trouble!
… Come clean to your boss
If you have a serious relationship with a co-worker, one of the first people you should tell at the office is your boss. It might be scary, but it's good to keep your superiors in the loop of changes in your personal life that could affect your work life.

Beforehand, check if your company has any specific policies of dating a co-worker. If it does, it’s better to stick to the rules.

… Keep sex to your bedroom
Or at least out of the office. Don't get tempted to get steamy at the office, even if you think you are alone, or the doors are locked. As exciting and thrilling as it might sound, keep in mind that getting caught will be embarrassing, and, in the worst case, could mean loss of your job. So don't even think about it, it's a bad idea!

Don't...

… Tell everybody straight away
If you've just started dating, don't go around telling everybody about your love for each other just yet. Give it a bit of time to see if your relationship is going to be stable, and you aren't just having a fling. Just imagine – it could get pretty embarrassing to explain to your co-workers that the love doves weren't so compatible after all.
… Favour your partner unconditionally
Don't change your behaviour towards each other now that you are dating. If your co-workers notice you are favouring your partner unconditionally, or that you aren't objective anymore, you will lose credibility.

It can be difficult to make a decision at work that could affect your personal life, like criticising your partner. It's a good idea to discuss possible issues at the beginning of your relationship, and make a plan on how to best cope with any problems.
… Take your dirty laundry to work
If you have relationship problems, keep them away from the office and don't drag co-workers into your issues. And certainly don't ask them to pick sides. It could make them uncomfortable. Not to mention that it makes you seem unprofessional. So maintain a truce while at work, and keep the fighting until you leave the office.