Mother, wife and a teacher

3-in-1: Wife, mom & professional

Women today have mastered the art of balancing home and work alike. What drives these women to do what is seemingly impossible? Read a touching personal account.

Rashi (name changed) is a 30-year-old school teacher from Patna.

Early marriage

I remember my initial struggle after getting married. I was married at 19. I belong to a middle-class family. We are a small family of four and my father is a retired bank worker. Back then, I hadn’t finished college and I was scared of the impact of my wedding on my career. I was studying to be a teacher and I was passionate about taking up a job in a school.

When I expressed this concern to my parents, they decided to let me finish my course before moving in with my husband. This arrangement also gave my husband some time to look for a stable and better job. My wedding was very simple. We wrapped up all ceremonies in two days. I was happy to see all my relatives on this special occasion. I felt excited and anxious at the same time. I can say that the chaos of my wedding distracted me from the tension around completing my teaching course.

New life, new start

Soon after my marriage, I got back to college. I was determined to get good grades as it would ensure jobs at better schools. My husband and his family were also supportive of my choice. They helped with everything they could. My husband would visit me regularly and make sure that I was never stressed. I visited him over the weekends too, just to understand my new life that I was soon going to start.

While I was struggling to live with two families and pursuing my studies, one day, I came to know that I was pregnant. I was happy and scared again. Four months before my final exams, I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. The joy of giving birth felt more important than anything else at that moment. My husband and my families were very happy with this new addition.

Happy days ahead

After giving birth, I was still living with my parents. My mother took up the responsibility of helping take care of my baby. She changed his diapers time to time while I was studying hard to pass my exams. I would leave my books aside whenever he cried and pick them up again once he fell asleep. Studying between my newborn child’s nap times made me feel very tired but I had no choice.

All this while, I constantly felt grateful towards my mother for helping me and allowing me to focus. I passed my exams with distinction and was ready for a job. Luckily, my husband also got a better job around the same time. We rented a house together in a small town near Patna. I joined the local primary school as an assistant teacher. Things were moving really fast and life was surprising both of us with one adventure after another.

No quitting

My husband worked a night shift at a chemical power plant. I would feel lonely throughout the night. My child kept me awake most nights because he couldn’t sleep. This resulted in me having poor sleeping patterns and dark circles. Upon noticing this, my husband took charge of our child during the day. He fed him, showered him and played with him. Watching them sleeping together after an exhausting day at school would certainly put a smile on my face.

Managing my job as a teacher, a newborn as a mother and a new house as a wife was definitely tiring. I had all the support that I could get but it still felt like three different jobs. Looking at my situation, my husband and my in-laws suggested that I quit my job. However, I wasn’t ready to quit yet. I knew these tough times would make me stronger.

Hard work pays

Slowly, things started getting easier. Within two years, I was promoted to a senior position. Today, I work as a senior teacher and a supervisor at a private school in Patna. My husband is also earning well and my kid has grown up into a beautiful young boy really fast.

We all are very happy and in a better position now. Looking back at the struggle, I really feel thankful to everyone who supported me. I would also like to tell many other women who are facing a similar situation that hard work always pays in the end. If I had not sacrificed my sleep back then, I wouldn’t be a part of this happy family today. Remember, when the going gets tough, the tough get going.

Have you had to make a choice between your career and motherhood? Share your story as a comment below or join us on Facebook. If you have any questions, please visit our discussion forum

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