Auntyji - Love Matters
Love Matters

Are all women insensitive and selfish?

By Auntyji Wednesday, August 10, 2016 - 10:49
Auntyji, my gf dumped me recently. She has no remorse about it. Do women like to use boys and throw them away when they are bored? It's hurtful. Ravi (24), Kanpur.

Auntyji saysAye haye puttar, eh ki? You sound just too upset, angry and heartbroken. Chal koi nahin, let’s talk… hain puttar? Cool down, puttar cool down!

Heartbreak horror

Achcha so your girl has walked out on you, hain? That is bad news. Puttar Ravi, heartbreaks hurt dude! For everyone and anyone. They are just terrible. You just can’t do anything but keep asking yourself, “Why me?”  You get into a terrible space of self-doubt and your self-esteem takes a beating. It may seem to you that you will never get out of this mess but one does, Ravi. Usually, one does. It just takes some time.

Signs and symptoms

So first, you think she isn’t sad about breaking up? Are you sure, Ravi? Did you not see it coming? Was your relationship fine and swinging and suddenly two days ago she just blocked you in all ways possible? Commonly it’s not so puttar. There may have been signs and signals. Maybe you didn’t see them coming?

Maybe she was trying to talk to you but you snubbed her off? Is this possible? Maybe you both just grew apart, puttar. She went off in one direction and you in another. You were just not able to keep pace with her and before you knew it, KABOOM!

You are two different people who are not in love anymore, or at least one isn’t.

Rule of thumb

Now let’s speak about other women. Dude, you think they all like to use and throw guys? Let’s ask the gals too. They will have equal number of anecdotes to share about you guys. This is a generalisation puttar. Aisa kuch nahin honda. All people, all hindus, all gay folks, all girls – each and every person is unique, individual, special and different.

There is no one monolith of people, whatever group they belong to. Too bad you are surrounded by women who dumped their boyfriends. That’s not what all women do and that’s not what only women do. Ask your girl pals how they got unceremoniously dumped by their boyfriends.

Double benefit

When you are in a relationship, you come close to a person who evokes all sorts of feelings and behaviours. You never knew you would go to a far away local market to bring Aalu Puri for her Sunday meal, did you? You never knew you would wait for her near her office with an umbrella because it was pouring, did you? You didn’t know that you were capable of all this, right?

So here’s the good news for you. When you break up, you realise what all qualities you are made of. You get to know yourself better. You know what type of a bf or gf you are and how much love you can give to others. Big plus, no? Love brings out so much in us and break ups help us recognise how cool we actually are.

Next time you approach a girl, you will have a strut in your walk and so much confidence in yourself. Lady, I know how to love and pursue you – that’s my calling card. So right now puttar, all you are going to do is cry and weep and you must. Real tears are better than fake tears. But soon, things will fade out and someone else – not extra small jhalleya but extra special will walk in. So relax and listen to sad songs for a while.

To protect the privacy of the author, the person in the photo is a model. 

Do you want to share something about your last breakup? Write your story in the comments below or share it on Facebook. If you have any questions, please visit our discussion forum.

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