Shani ki dasha in 2021, what to do?
Love Matters India

Shani ki dasha this year, what to do?

By Auntyji Tuesday, December 22, 2020 - 14:11
Hi Aunty ji, my horoscope says this year is not good for any relationships, what to do? Ankita, 22, Baroda.

Auntyji says, ‘Beta horoscope nahin, I call it a horror-scope! Let’s see what we can do’.

Star crossed

Ankita, you know I love horoscopes – do you know why? If anything wrong happens, you have someone to blame. In this case – the stars. Now you tell me one thing – how many people of your own star sign do you know? At least 10?

How many in your class or college? Hundreds maybe? So how do you expect that every single person with this star sign will have the exact same luck as you? Each of them is going to have rubbish relationships this year? Do you think yeh ho sakta hai – doubtful no?

Star attraction

The draw of star signs and other such is huge mainly because they serve as huge distractions. Sometimes, when we are in shaky waters, we begin to believe anything that comes our way. We grab that one straw, that one buoy which we feel may salvage our sinking ship.

Lekin this is really just us trying to convince ourselves. Beta Ankita, a good relationship is based on great chemistry, some fun, some mutual interests and a lot of trust, care, and consent.

Sure, read your favourite astrologer – the Sunday newspaper or wherever you get your hands on it – crack a joke or two but don’t get caught up in these activities, nor take them as the final truth. They can be all-consuming and rather harming.

Different tactics

So let’s try something else. How about you try to keep all your relationships on an even keel? How about you do some introspection learning from you past rishtas and weigh in what worked for you and what didn’t – about yourself.

So some self-critique too maybe? For eg: ‘I was too critical about my partner’s sense of dressing’. So this time I will love my partner for who they are. Even if their sense of dress is as outrageous as Ranveer Singh – I shall be Deepika!

Similarly, you may have another realisation, ‘why did I put up with so much constant criticism – I am not going to allow it this time’ and you begin your relationship with some ‘rules’.

By and large depend on yourself and your partner to make any relationship work. Don’t bother to blame it on anyone else, least of all the nakshatras.

The sun and the star

I had a friend in my college days who used to believe these readings doggedly. If she didn't like the one her own paper had – she would call me to ask what my paper said for her. Soon it became a routine between us.

The minute we would put our respective papers down, we would miraculously forget what we had read and moaned and groaned over.

The only benefit this zodiac reading had was, it gave us time to really talk and chat with each other – every Sunday. Dosti pakki. Ironically, I don’t recall reading in either of our sun signs, that ‘this week your friendships will become even better’.

You yourself are the sun and star of your relationship. Give it your best shot. That way you are at least sure you tried and if it works super. If not, well maybe then you were not in your partner's stars!

*To protect the identity, names have been changed and the person in the picture is a model.

This article was first published on February 8, 2019. 

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Comments
Supriya bete bahut bura laga sunkar, lekin Jab ek rishta ek makaam taka a ke ruk jaata hai, toh use phir shuru karna ya us per hee tike rehana shayed itnee samjhdaari nahin. Aage badhiye, naye kadam uthaiye, naye aur purane dost dhoondhiye, films, music, koi hobbies. Jaise ki unhone keeya hai. Apni zindigi jeene mein utar jaiye. All the best. https://lovematters.in/en/news/shes-avoiding-me-now-what https://lovematters.in/hi/love-and-relationships/breaking-up/how-to-get-over-a-break-up-a-proven-technique https://lovematters.in/en/love-and-relationships/she-never-said-no-but-she-meant-so Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare disccsion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
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