Auntyji Love Matters
Love Matters

Should I allow my GF to access sexual health info online?

By Auntyji Tuesday, July 11, 2017 - 18:36
'Hi Auntyji, I often post questions on sexual health forums on my girlfriend's behalf. I feel these websites, though useful, are not really appropriate or safe for girls. But she now insists on accessing information herself. What should I do?’ Prateek, 25, Indore.

Auntyji says… Lo dasso, what should you do? Puttar, you have a lot to do! Let's see how.

Gyan ka bhandar

Sunn beta, now that you have scoured almost all available websites and forums on these issues – you must be khazaana of jaankari and information. You must be the most updated and up to speed guy on the block – hai ki nahin. If anyone wants to know where to get information on sexual health matters, they know who to ask – Apna Prateek from Indore – wah wah! Aye hui na gall.

Best of your ability

So project No 1. Give the gal a list of all the best rated websites you know – Love Matters toh sabse pehlehai ki nahin! Then tell her why you like some and don’t like some. Guide her on how she can navigate certain sites – some can be very confusing – some are easy and friendly... just like...? Sahi jawaab – Love Matters. You can talk to her about cybercrime and how she must protect herself. You can tell her about how she can keep her anonymity and privacy and why that is important. See – you can do so much!

To each her own

What you cannot do betaji, is to do it for her. She is an adult, she has her own issues and questions and she has her own way of framing them – so she must be allowed to do so – should she not? Waise puttar – allow – disallow ka toh matter hee nahin. That we can do only for children – till they allow you to – after which woh bhi nahin kar saktey! Right? Also beta you are her boyfriend – not the Viceroy of Imperial India – it's her right to access information. You cannot stop her, edit or censor her, come in her way – that is out and out control – and beta, we must quickly recognise when we are falling in that trap.

In the garb of safety

Beta, often we feel we are trying to safeguard her. You think that's care. Also, we seem to think that girls need protecting – that's not quite true. Not just girls – each human being and animal – must enjoy safety. But let's not confuse that by prohibiting girls and women to access what is rightfully theirs. It’s her right to ask and access information of sex, sexuality, your relationship even – from whoever, wherever she chooses and pleases  What you can do is to suggest, prepare and guide, but not control or handle her needs.

Information for everyone

Information is power. Power to learn, power to make more informed choices, to decipher between good and bad, right and wrong. And that comes only with reading and getting good quality information.That young girls are using their own mind, their education to make better choices should make us very proud and happy, not terrified or scared. Ha ki nahin beta. Chal phir – give it up – the list of good forums and websites, and the control!

Should men and women have similar access to information? Share your thoughts with us on your Facebook page. If you have a personal question, please visit our discussion forum.

Comments
Add new comment

Comment

  • Allowed HTML tags: <a href hreflang>