Auntyji Love Matters
Love Matters

How can I quit being a sex worker?

By Auntyji Tuesday, January 10, 2017 - 17:33
Auntyji, I am a sex worker. I do it to support my family but I’ve begun feeling terrible. I want to quit this and find a proper job. Please help! Sheela (19), Orissa.

Auntyji says…  Dear Sheela, sabse pehele toh your Auntyji wants to salute you. Salute to you for taking up the responsibility of your family and doing what seemed best to you at that time. Ek badi si jhappi!

Kill the shame

Beta, before we talk about any changes, I would like to understand something. Why are you feeling terrible? Is it because of the judgment, taboo, stigma and shame associated with prostitution?

If you work at a big office, no one judges you, even if your boss humiliates you, shouts at you and makes you feel small daily!

And it’s not even about working in an office, hai na?

If you work as a rag picker, no one judges you or points a finger at you. But prostitution, there is always a big haaaaawwww around it even though millions of men, women and transgender earn their living working in this profession.

But who makes these rules? To say one job is respectable and other not?  No one can betaji, no one. Just because one wears a business suit and goes to an MNC doesn’t make their job better than the others.

Life throws many challenges at us and we choose what we think is best at that time.

So Bete Sheela, drop that shame and guilt I say. You do this because you think it is most useful for your family and that is respectable.  Give yourself a well-deserved pat on the back and look at the future.

New year, new choices

Betaji, what a perfect timing! It’s a new year and a time to start afresh now, hai na?

I do hope your family’s financial condition is stable now and that you are not under so much pressure.

Now that you’ve made up your mind, you have to first figure out what makes you feel happy and satisfied. What is that you want to or aspire to do?

Once you have thought through these things, the next step would be to invest in learning some new skills as they will come in handy in finding a new job.

Aur fir kya betaji, lag jaa kaam pe! Start looking for a job and make sure you approach every job interview with confidence.

Been there, done that

Do you know your biggest qualification beta? You have dealt with all the challenges that life has thrown at you. So what can hold you back now?

At any work, one has to address challenges and find resolutions. Only ways and means differ. And you already have done that betaji, many times.

So I’d say you are ready to face the world and laugh at people who try to bully you.

You have dealt with much worse, haven’t you? Toh betaji, chinta chod, bas kamar kas le.

And before I say ta ta, I want to once again give you my special shabaashi. Betaji, hats off for taking charge of your life. Go do your stuff! With your head held high and your beautiful body and spirit intact, full of dignity and garima.

Should I change your name to that Miss Sheela? Garima from United Girls of All India! All the best, beta.

To protect the privacy of the author, the person in the picture is a model. All names have also been changed in this text.

Do you agree that sex work is just like any other work? Shoot your comments below or share them on Facebook. If you have any questions, please visit our discussion forum.

Auntyji says…  Dear Sheela, sabse pehele toh your Auntyji wants to salute you. Salute to you for taking up the responsibility of your family and doing what seemed best to you at that time. Ek badi si jhappi!

Kill the shame

Beta, before we talk about any changes, I would like to understand something. Why are you feeling terrible? Is it because of the judgment, taboo, stigma and shame associated with prostitution?

If you work at a big office, no one judges you, even if your boss humiliates you, shouts at you and makes you feel small daily!

And it’s not even about working in an office, hai na?

If you work as a rag picker, no one judges you or points a finger at you. But prostitution, there is always a big haaaaawwww around it even though millions of men, women and transgender earn their living working in this profession.

But who makes these rules? To say one job is respectable and other not?  No one can betaji, no one. Just because one wears a business suit and goes to an MNC doesn’t make their job better than the others.

Life throws many challenges at us and we choose what we think is best at that time.

So Bete Sheela, drop that shame and guilt I say. You do this because you think it is most useful for your family and that is respectable.  Give yourself a well-deserved pat on the back and look at the future.

New year, new choices

Betaji, what a perfect timing! It’s a new year and a time to start afresh now, hai na?

I do hope your family’s financial condition is stable now and that you are not under so much pressure.

Now that you’ve made up your mind, you have to first figure out what makes you feel happy and satisfied. What is that you want to or aspire to do?

Once you have thought through these things, the next step would be to invest in learning some new skills as they will come in handy in finding a new job.

Aur fir kya betaji, lag jaa kaam pe! Start looking for a job and make sure you approach every job interview with confidence.

Been there, done that

Do you know your biggest qualification beta? You have dealt with all the challenges that life has thrown at you. So what can hold you back now?

At any work, one has to address challenges and find resolutions. Only ways and means differ. And you already have done that betaji, many times.

So I’d say you are ready to face the world and laugh at people who try to bully you.

You have dealt with much worse, haven’t you? Toh betaji, chinta chod, bas kamar kas le.

And before I say ta ta, I want to once again give you my special shabaashi. Betaji, hats off for taking charge of your life. Go do your stuff! With your head held high and your beautiful body and spirit intact, full of dignity and garima.

Should I change your name to that Miss Sheela? Garima from United Girls of All India! All the best, beta.

To protect the privacy of the author, the person in the picture is a model. All names have also been changed in this text.

Do you agree that sex work is just like any other work? Shoot your comments below or share them on Facebook. If you have any questions, please visit our discussion forum.

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