Auntyji - Love Matters
Love Matters

My gf makes me insecure about my body - help please!

By Auntyji Tuesday, May 10, 2016 - 13:56
Auntyji, my gf keeps on talking about fair and muscular guys. I am neither very fair nor muscular. I feel very insecure. Please help! Andrew (24), Dhanbad.

Auntyji says… Oh ho, looking for Tokyo, going to Hong Kong! Is this your gf’s maamla, dear Andrew?

The real thing

So beta what’s the situation in your relationship? Are you being compared to Ranveer Singh or Shahid Kapur? Are you supposed to be like them? Beta, let’s separate the two things first.

We all may fancy someone. You may think Pariniti Chopra is the cutest person in the world. “Yaar yeh haan bole toh I will introduce her to my mummy in a red sari.” Does it mean that jab tak Pariniti says yes, tab tak you will kaam chalao with your gf? Your gf is not a substitute for someone else, is she? So similarly dude, neither are you. You are the real thing.

In close comfort

So you both are in a relationship for a reason, right? Many reasons in fact. What are they? What draws her to you and vice versa? What do you both have in common? Do you even remember that, Andrew?

Do those reasons still apply to the two of you? Do they still hold true? Are you both going good together or has her judgement on muscles and fair skin faded your interest? Do a quick check, puttar. Do you guys still feel the same love or are you becoming a comfortable habit for each other?

Benefit of doubt

On the other hand, aisa toh nahin that she is only voicing her opinions. Like you know, “Oh God! Ranveer is so hot!” or “Shahid is so cool.” If that is the case, then she only feels that she can express herself around you, with no fear.

Maybe she feels you won’t mind, because it’s you who she actually really loves.

Maybe in her exuberance, she has just forgotten that she is gushing over aspects which you don’t have and that is making you feel not-so-nice. Am I right? Maybe she has just missed the signs. Aisa toh nahin puttar?

Compare and contrast

Puttar baat cheet to banti hai. Call her over a date. Ask her if she is missing something in you.  Express yourself, cool and straight that comparisons are useless. They only cause hurt and harm and don’t help with anything.


It’s funny. Girls hate it when men compare them to their age-old dushman, the mother-in-law. “No one makes aaloo ke paranthe like my mummy!” This is enough to get the gf or wife snorting like Bull Torro. When they do it themselves, they forget how much it can hurt and diminish the other person.

For better, not worse

Sunn Andrew, are you insecure that she may leave you for someone better? Puttar, you are the better one here. Don’t underestimate yourself for a man who is far and away, or someone she thinks is a demi-god based on media and film reports.


If you have been a good friend, a caring lover, a pal, a partner and a good support to her, I tell you, you are the better guy already. Don’t let any ‘Incredible Man’ come in your way of knowing what a great lover you actually are. Mard ko bhi dard hota hai. Partners, are you listening?

To protect the author's privacy, the person in the picture is a model.

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बेटे वीर्य का गढ़ा-मोटा होने से कोई संबंध नही है ज़रा यह पढ़ो: यदि इस मुद्दे पर आप और गहरी चर्चा में जुड़ना चाहते हैं, तो हमारे डिस्कशन बोर्ड, " जस्ट पूछो" में ज़रूर शामिल हों.
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