Auntyji
thingkreations

Sex stopped when she got pregnant – what now?

By Auntyji Tuesday, April 3, 2012 - 17:04
Q: My wife is not interested in sex anymore, now that we have a baby. I feel that for her it was like, "OK, I am pregnant...now no more sex". What should I do? Sachin, Bhopal

Auntyji says… Now, worry not ji, this is perfectly natural.

It's obvious that your life will never be the same. And I am sure that you are looking forward to a lot of joy, a lot more responsibilities and some changes as well. Especially if the baby is your first one.

I understand your situation. Don't be surprised to find your wife less interested in sex than you are.

Motherhood is almost a full time job. Let her get used to the feeling. There will be times when you might feel neglected or even frustrated. But don’t let her know that. I know you will suddenly feel like that you are not the most important person in her life. Right?

Insecure


So as I say, no need to worry, your wife is feeling just like many, many other women. It's not that she is not interested in you or being with you anymore.

I'll be surprised if your votti is not worried about the repair of an episiotomy or some stitches that she had.

Also, media constantly tells us that even a slightly overweight woman is not sexy, so maybe she's just a bit insecure. Go ahead, make her feel comfortable and good about her body. Tell her how she still rocks your life and you'll be rocking the bed in no time.

Spice


Basically play your cards strategically. Remember her sex drive is not dead, maybe just subdued. The little bundle of joy soaks up her time, energy and emotions.

So maybe try something new to spice up the things. Maybe at times you can be spontaneous, maybe at times ask her what she wants. After my first-born, I too was kind of coy for a few months, but your uncle was quite a player. And I am glad to share his secret with you today.

Snuggle time


Sachin, remember that you have the home team advantage, so use it. You already know what rocks her boat. So push the right buttons and then start the engine. Rev slowly until warmed up. Focus on her needs, entice her and then just wait for your turn. Yes I am advising a little bit of manipulation but it’s for a good cause, so am sure rab will forgive me. In my experience, there is no sex better than gratitude sex.

Most importantly don't rush anything. Try to plan some time alone, even if it's just to cuddle: Having a baby may leave you feeling ‘touched out,’ but some special snuggle time with your wife can help revive that, even before sexual intercourse is allowed or wanted. Sooner the later, she will want ‘it’ too. Lets just reach that time and space mutually.

On slow days, feel free to resort to masturbation. There is nothing bad or unhealthy about it. Perfect way to let out the steam.

Quality not quantity


But getting back to your main concern, remember that bedtime might not always be the right time. Nor will the bedroom always be the right place. Try out different places to have sex!

Remember ultimately it's all about quality not quantity: You don't have to have sex every night, maybe just every week – or whatever suits you, there is no right or wrong. Figure out what timing is right for you.

Take your time. Having sex before you are ready (your mind or your body) can be potentially harmful to your relationship. So don’t think short term, take it slow and easy, and you will indeed reap the benefits.

To protect the identity, the person in the picture is a model and names have been changed. 

Have questions? Please ask Love Matters (LM) experts on our discussion forum. Don't forget to check out our Facebook  page.

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Comments
mahi rawat
Thu, 04/09/2015 - 19:53
gud afternoon mam, how r u?? mam merko 19feb ko last date aayi thi or humne sex kiya or mein ab pregnant hu. yani meri pregnancy ko 2nd month chal RHA h to mam kal humne do bar sex kiya ek din k time or fir rat k time sex kafi achha hua that but merko rat ko discharge ni hua din me Halka sa hua or mere husband be din k waqt discharge and at hi kr diya to mam mein ye janna chahti hu ki kya issue bachhe me koi asar to ni hoga Jo humne sex or discharge kiya?? plzz mam iska reply jarir kijiyega ye mera first pregnancy h or mein ni chahti ki kuch bura ho so plz koi BT batye
Beta pehle toh doctor se milkar yeh Nishchint kar lo ki yaadi sab theek hai toh kuch sawadhaniyo ka istemal kartey huay aap sex kar sakti hain,Lekin Jab aap tayyar feel karein, ready hon, koi dard ya takleegf mein naa hon… aur yaad rakhiye, ki aap kabhi bhi pregnant ho sakteeh hain. So take precautions. https://lovematters.in/hi/news/sex-after-pregnancy-how-can-i-tell-him-im-not-ready
Periods ke duran sez mein koi dikatt nahi maslan dono partners ki isse karne mein barabar ki marzi shamil ho toh condom ka istemal karte huay sex kiya ja sakta hai.Lekin yaad rakhiye is duran condom ka istemal anivarya hai taaki kisi bhi sankarman se bachha ja sake.
Hastmaithun ek safe /surakshit tareek ahai apni santushti karne ka. Isse koi nuksaan ya beemari nahin hoti aur phir Yeh koi beemari thodi na hai- , Lekin haan, sirf iske hee bare mein saara waqt sochna aapki baki ki zindingi se aapko door ya laaparvaah kar na de, isliye iske bare mein itna sochene ki bhi avashayakta nahin. So koi aur activities kar lo, movies – BF Nahin – dost- yaar, books, gym, exercise… enjoy karo aur relaxed raho. http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/men-masturbating
Hmmm! Suniye Mahi Shuru se third month tak aur phir saatvein mahene se le kar …. Is samy avoid keejiye. Jo apko pasansd ho who hee keejiye , jo doctor salaah de who bhi samjh leejiye. Aur dekho bête behtar hoga ki aap condom ka isltemal karein. Ya phir discharge andar NA hone dein. Iske ilava apni comfort ka poora dhyaan keejiye. http://lovematters.in/en/comment/13731#comment-13731
Yadi aap sex pregnancy ke risk se bachna chatay hai to kisi aur tarikay kay mukabley Condom ka istemal hi easy aur safe tarika hai. http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/safe-sex Iske alawa garbhniodhan ke kuch aur uppaye aap yaha padhiye: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/birth-control
Relax, Ronny beta! Ling ke size mein ek apna teda pann hona is quite common bete. Don't worry, isse koi samsaya nahin hoti hai. Yeh padhiye zara: https://lovematters.in/en/resource/penis-shapes-and-sizes Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain toh hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil hon! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Maim meri wife ka 6th month complite hone mera sex karne k liye dil karta hai kya hm sex kr sakte hain meri wife ka bhi dil karta hai hambistar k liye kya hm sex kar sakte hain plz reply soon ...I will wait ur reply
Ok beta kapil, the answer is a bit of a yes and no. suniye. Chahe toh aap log sex kar saktey hain lekin pet par koi zor na pade, aur to aur, andar discharge avoid keejiye. unhe kya theek lagta hai, woh kar saktey hain aur saath hee chahe toh kuch websites pe, positions jo ki khaas preganacy ke liy ehain woh bhi dekh saktey hain. All the best.
Maim meri wife ka 6th month complite hone mera sex karne k liye dil karta hai kya hm sex kr sakte hain meri wife ka bhi dil karta hai hambistar k liye kya hm sex kar sakte hain plz reply soon ...I will wait ur reply
YADI aapka masik chakr sahi aur santulit hai- yaani ki har mahine lag bhag unhee dino mein aata hai- toh, aap mid cycle yaani ki un dino jab mahila ka anda utpann hota hai, un dino aap sex keejiye aur discharge bhi yoni mein hee ho- toh chances bad jayenge. Hoep you understand.
Matlab? Ejaculation? Toh suniye bete Shuru se third month tak aur phir saatvein mahene se le kar …. Is samy avoid keejiye. Jo wife ko pasansd ho who hee keejiye , jo doctor salaah de who bhi samjh leejiye. Aur dekho bête behtar hoga ki aap condom ka isltemal karein. Ya phir discharge andar NA hone dein. Iske ilava wife ki comfort ka poora dhyaan keejiye. http://lovematters.in/en/comment/13731#comment-13731
meri wife ko 3 month pregnent ke ho gaye hai kya mai sex kar sakta hun agar mai sex karta hu to meri wife bhi mana nhi karti wo bhi sex karne ko kehti hai
Mam hamari sadi ka one month huwa hai ham 2 years tak bacha nahi chahte hai to ham kis samay sex kare bina kandome ke ki pregnency ka dar na ho
Actually yeh poori tareh se na, mahila kee mahavari pe depend hota hai, yadi who bilkul nirdharit hai ya nahin jiski vajeh se bahut hee risk ka kaam bhi hai. Yadi aap bina kisi protection key ya bina surakhsha ke sex ki soch rahe hai toh shayad aap un dino ki baat kar rahe hain jin mein bachcha rukna mushkil hai. Yeh ho toh sakta hai lekin yeh poori terh se surakshit nahin mana jaata hai. yadi aap sex pregnancy ke risk se bachna chatay hai to kisi aur tarikay kay mukabley Condom ka istemal hi easy aur safe tarika hai http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/safe-sex http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/fertility http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/birth-contro
jitendra gupta
Fri, 02/13/2015 - 00:15
meri age 22 saal hai hamari saadi huye 10 mahina ho gaya abhi tak meri wife pragnet nhi huyi pragnet hone ke liya kab sex kare
Dekho bête yeh keh pana Ki kaun kab aur kiss din garb dharan kar leyga ya falana din mein koi garbh dharn kar leta hai zara mushkil hai kyunki yeh Har kisi ke liye alag hai. is baaray mein aur jyada detail mein yah padhiye saath hi jaldi pregnancy ke tips bhi yaha padh lijiye: http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/tips http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/pregnancy
deepankar
Thu, 03/12/2015 - 00:11
dear mem meri wife ko 2mahne pahle date hua nahi tha to use rimover teblets dene k bad next month date hua tha hamne bich me sex kia tha to use ab ulti jesa lagta h date ka time ane wala h rply karna
Nmstey aunty ji meri shadi ko 1 year ho gya hai.or prevent ho gyi thi 3 month ho bye period nhi aye BT last 3 rd month mai ho period agya mera bcha gir gya aunty ESA kyua hua kiss karan hua plzz help me
Raaj than
Fri, 04/03/2015 - 22:51
merit biwi 45 din se pregnant h Bach me hmne sex hiya that jiske bad use bleeding hui ab say normal h ab hm phir se sex krna ka man krna to ka hm sex kr sakte h plz ans me
mam meri wife ko pregnant krne ke liye konse time me sex kre kya ander discharge hone se ledies pregnant ho jatI h plz btana
babli joshi
Fri, 04/24/2015 - 10:55
Nameste aunty ji meri shadi ko 3 saal ho gye lekin abhi tk koi gud news nhi mili. Doctor ko bhi dikha diya hai sab test ok hai lekin infertility problem hai...mai kya kru aunty ji jis se ki mujhe bhi gud news mil jaye..ab sab taane dene lge hai. Plz aunty ji help me....
Shuru se third month tak aur phir saatvein mahene se le kar …. Is samy avoid keejiye. Jo wife ko pasansd ho who hee keejiye , jo doctor salaah de who bhi samjh leejiye. Aur dekho bête behtar hoga ki aap condom ka isltemal karein. Ya phir discharge andar NA hone dein. Iske ilava wife ki comfort ka poora dhyaan keejiye. http://lovematters.in/en/comment/13731#comment-13731
aunty ji meri mc 21 ko hua tha mien ovoulation date pta kr k us ne sex ki ab mere mc ane ko one week bache h ky mie isme sex kr sakti hu plz mujhe bataye mein pregent hona chati hun
Suniye Shuru se third month tak aur phir saatvein mahene se le kar …. Is samy avoid keejiye. Jo wife ko pasansd ho who hee keejiye , jo doctor salaah de who bhi samjh leejiye. Aur dekho bête behtar hoga ki aap condom ka isltemal karein. Ya phir discharge andar NA hone dein. Iske ilava wife ki comfort ka poora dhyaan keejiye. https://lovematters.in/hi/news/sex-during-pregnancy-top-five-facts
Bete yadi adi aap pregnancy ke risk se bachna chatay hai to kisi aur tarikay kay mukabley Condom ka istemal hi easy aur safe tarika hai http://lovematters.in/hi/resource/safe-sex Lekin garbhnirodhan ke aur bhi upaye hain jinhe aap apni suvidha ke hisaab se chun sakti hain woh aap yaha padhiye: https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/birth-control
Me jab meri biwi ko sex karta hu to vo thodi der tak sex enjoy karte hai bad me usako dard hora hai. . .ham forply me bhi jyada time lete hai use pura maZa
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