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Pornography: do's and don'ts

Porn can make you sizzle with arousal, for your private pleasure or for sharing with a partner. How can you get the best out of it? And what are the pitfalls? Read on to find out.

Do…

  • …keep it legal
    Despite recent efforts by the Government of India and the Department of Telecom to block and ban certain internet pornography sites, watching pornography in India is still legal. But producing or publishing porn or even sharing porn is illegal.

    Do stay away from any websites that show children being sexually exploited. As with all else, use your discretion.
  • …watch porn with your partner
    More and more couples are increasingly watching pornography together, studies have shown. Watching a film together can add a bit of zing and variety to your sex life. Porn lets your imagination go wild and enhances your sexual chemistry. Try searching for ‘women-friendly porn’ for erotic films to please both of you.
  • …clear your browser history
    Stop your browser from storing your history, so no one can see what you’ve been looking at afterwards. You can do this by switching to InPrivate Browsing (Internet Explorer), Private Browsing (Firefox) or Incognito mode (Google Chrome). Alternatively, clear your browser history when you’ve finished.

    Private browsing won’t make you anonymous on the internet though. And remember any downloaded files will still be on your computer.

    If you do store files on your computer, hide them away in password-protected zip folders so that no one can accidentally stumble across your stash of pornography.

Don't…

  • …confuse porn with real life
    Most porn is fantasy. Real people don’t look that way, act that way or orgasm that way. That can be an advantage of porn – it lets you explore fantasies you wouldn’t necessarily want to act out in real life. But there can be pitfalls.

    In pornography, the man endlessly hammers in and out of the woman while she moans ‘Oh yeah baby!’ The woman has huge breasts and loves it when the man comes in her face. The man has a huge penis and keeps going for hours on end. He always pulls out to ejaculate. Real sex isn’t like that.

    Don’t let porn desensitise you so only the fantasy will turn you on. Watching porn can make it easier for men to see women the way they are often portrayed in porn – as sex objects, only there to please men.

    In real life, endless hammering isn’t the secret to giving your partner orgasms. Quality goes a long way and she'll appreciate it more if you don't act like a porn star!

    And just because the actors may seem to be enjoying it, it does not necessarily mean that they are. Remember that while some women enter the adult film business of their own free will, many are exploited. So don’t be carried away by the make-believe fantasy world of pornography.
  • …copy the aggression in porn
    Rough play is often shown in porn movies, but remember that those are professional actors who do this for a living. It's far tougher for the camera to capture a gentle touch than an aggressive strong feel. Actions are therefore overstated.

    Don’t assume your partner wants you to grab her and be forceful, or smack her bottom. If she enjoys some rough play, she will let you know, so take it slow and easy and pay attention to the signals she's sending out.
  • …just follow a routine
    Great sex happens when both partners are clued in to each and in tune with the other's wants and desires. This means feeling each other out and taking your time to discover each other. Don’t just launch into a routine you've seen in your favourite porn film. Instead observe her reactions and find your own way forward. Everyone is different.

    If you and your partner enjoy watching porn together, don’t do it every time. It’s a shame if you can only get turned on together by watching porn. Variety is the spice of life!
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