Dealing with rejection
© Love Matters | Rita Lino

How to overcome being rejected

Dumped? Feeling the pain? Confused? Join the club. Here are some tips to help you come out the other side:

How to overcome being rejected

Whether it’s a job or a date, everyone ends up getting rejected at some point. And it’s a fact of life: being told ‘no’ hurts. It can be embarrassing and overwhelming. Everyone reacts differently and there are no quick fixes, but here are some basic tips that might help.

Your pain is normal

Anger, sadness, disappointment and hurt are common emotions to experience after a rejection. You may even have physical side effects, such as headaches, stomach pain or nausea. (If you suffer from depression or similar conditions, your symptoms may even be worse, so don’t hesitate to consult your doctor.)

You’re allowed to be sad

You’re only human and it’s normal to feel overcome by emotions after a rejection. You don’t have to ‘be strong’ or ‘put on a brave face.’

Find and express your emotions

If this is the first time you’ve experienced rejection or the end of a relationship, it may take you a while to sort out your feelings.

  • Having a good cry in a place you feel safe, such as your bedroom, can help release pent-up emotions. Let it all out. We all do it. Being a real person means you have real emotions. There’s nothing to be ashamed of.
  • Try to write down how you feel – not for anyone else, just for yourself. It can help you to work out how you really feel. And once the thoughts are down on paper, they might stop swirling round in your head.
     
Share your feelings with friends
Dealing with rejection

Share your feelings with friends

Share your experience with people who care about you. And listen to their stories. If you hear how others have coped with rejection, you may start to believe that you’ll be able to cope as well.

Stick to the facts

It can be easy to start over-analysing the situation or to add details that may or may not be true. For example, instead of saying:

‘That girl didn’t kiss me at the party because I’m fat and ugly.’

Stick to the facts, which are:

‘That girl didn’t kiss me at the party.’

We know that it’s still a rejection and it doesn’t change the fact that a girl didn’t kiss you. But by sticking with what actually happened, you avoid upsetting yourself even more.

Avoid physical violence or seeking revenge

If someone rejects you, it hurts, but it’s their absolute right. Never, ever try to hurt them back. Also, don’t take out your bad feelings on other people around you, by getting aggressive or violent. This will just push people away from you – and likely lead to more rejections and unhappiness.

Don’t fall into bad habits

Booze, smoking, partying, drugs, random sex, greasy food… These are all methods people use to try and comfort themselves. But in the long run, they will only make you feel worse about yourself. Better to occupy your mind with something worthwhile, like sports or creativity.

 

Keep active. Learn something new.

The busier you are, the less time you will have to feel sad. Take up a new sport. Join a club. Learn an instrument. Try a new hobby. Learn a new skill. You will meet new people and feel better about yourself.

Focus on your positive qualities

Rebuild your self-esteem! Start by asking your friends what they like about you. If this feels too awkward, write your own list of qualities that make you the perfect person to date. Are you loyal and caring? A good listener? A talented cook? Try to remember the times your friends and family have praised you. It will remind you that you are indeed quite fab.

Give yourself time to heal and forgive

Like most clichés, it’s mostly true: ‘time is the great healer’. But clichés are often easier said than done!

We know it hurts now and it’s hard to imagine ever feeling different. But one day you’ll come out the other side. Promise. Then you’ll be ready to meet new and interesting people – one of whom will likely fall for you!

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बेटे अगर आपको अपनी गर्ल फ्रेंड का नंबर चाहिए तो इसके बारे में उनसे बात कीजिए। माफ़ कीजियेगा हम आपकी इस विषय में कोई सहायता नहीं कर सकते. कोई सवाल हैं तो पूछिए. https://lovematters.in/hi/love-and-relationships/do-indian-men-not-understand-consent यदि किसी भी मुद्दे पर आप गहरी चर्चा में जुड़ना चाहते हैं, तो हमारे डिस्कशन बोर्ड, " जस्ट पूछो" में ज़रूर शामिल हों. https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Shyam bête yani ki unki marji nahi thi, unki marji ka samman kijiye. Aur yadi koi humaare saath nahin rehana chahtey toh kyaa hum unhe force kar saktey hain? Nhain na?!! Aur bete sabse pahle dost banaiye, dosti ke liye na ki GF ke liye, phir dekhiye kya baat bantee hai. Zara soch khulli kijiye!! Apna look theek thaak kijiye, saaf suthre to dikhiye... koi badbudaar nahin!! Aur alag alag baaton mein dilchaspi rakhiye aur dikhaiye!! https://lovematters.in/hi/news/how-do-i-get-girlfriend https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/love-and-relationships https://lovematters.in/hi/love-and-relationships/meeting-someone/saying-no Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Neeraj bete sex ki ichha hona bohot hi common hai par hum aapki ismein koi sahayata nahi kar saktay! Lekin aap hastmethun try kar saktay hain kyunki Hastmaithun ek safe /surakshit tareek ahai apni santushti karne ka. https://lovematters.in/hi/resource/men-masturbating Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Manish bete toh sabse poahle dost banaiye, dosti ke liye na ki GF ke liye, phir dekhiye kya baat bantee hai. Zara soch khulli kijiye!! Apna look theek thaak kijiye, saaf suthre to dikhiye... koi badbudaar nahin!! Aur alag alag baaton mein dilchaspi rakhiye aur dikhaiye!! https://lovematters.in/hi/news/how-do-i-get-girlfriend Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Bete toh zara soch khulli kijiye!! Apna look theek thaak kijiye, saaf suthre to dikhiye... koi badbudaar nahin!! Aur alag alag baaton mein dilchaspi rakhiye aur dikhaiye!! https://lovematters.in/hi/news/how-do-i-get-girlfriend Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Sorry Kush bete contact number ki suvidha toh upalabadh nahi hai lekin aap apna sawal yaha likh sakte hain, hum poori koshish karenge aapko sahi salah dene ki. Yadi aap kisi bhee mudde par humse gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Actually I have only attraction with a boy who is Gujjar and now because of his pysho behavior..I want to leave him but he is saying I will come at your home and will say to your father all things .so what to do now..
Oh God Ankita beta- he is very "pycho".So now the issue is that this is blackmail. so you can either prepare you father- a boy is after me story... and hope he never shows up but be ready for the worst OR you tell/ Prepare your family with the ""guy is after me"" old line OR you confront him and tell him. https://lovematters.in/hi/love-and-relationships/sexual-harassment/abusive-relationships https://lovematters.in/hi/love-and-relationships/breaking-up/how-to-get-over-a-break-up-a-proven-technique If you would like to join in on a further discussion on this topic, join our discussion board, "Just Ask” https://lovematters.in/en/forum
I do like her. Unfortunately for me, she has a boyfriend and I am fed up being ignored by her. I don't know what to do. I respect her choice but I also can't stop myself thinking about her. How to keep my mind at peace???
Ani puttar if one doesn’t wants to be with us, can we force them? No? !! Look if she wants to be with you, she has to make this decision, you can't get them yes just because only you love her. Keep calm and keep your thinking healthy. Go ahead, take new steps. Meet new old friends, films, music, any hobbies. Enjoy your life. All the best. https://lovematters.in/en/news/shes-avoiding-me-now-what https://lovematters.in/hi/love-and-relationships/breaking-up/how-to-get-over-a-break-up-a-proven-technique If you would like to join in on a further discussion on this topic, join our discussion board, "Just Ask” https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Dear one thing, that is "faith" is very necessary in the relationships, So, what do you think?? What is the reason of this kind of behaviour? She doesn't want to leave you alone - but I think that if there is love, faith or regards exists in the relationship, there is no matter of outing alone, there are lots of work, which we have to do alone. So, the thing is perhaps you need to ask her and try to know the main cause of it, And also improve your faith and love in your relationship and make happy married life. OK!! https://lovematters.in/hi/love-and-relationships/happy-relationships/how-do-you-know-your-relationship-is-the-right-one? https://lovematters.in/en/love-and-relationships/yes-i-am-happily-unmarried If you would like to join in on a further discussion on this topic, join our discussion board, "Just Ask” https://lovematters.in/en/forum
Suraj bete toh dosti se shuruat kijiye - zara soch khulli kijiye!! Apna look theek thaak kijiye, saaf suthre to dikhiye... koi badbudaar nahin!! Aur alag alag baaton mein dilchaspi rakhiye aur dikhaiye!! Fir dekhiye kya baat banti hai!! https://lovematters.in/hi/news/how-do-i-get-girlfriend Yadi aap is mudde par humse aur gehri charcha mein judna chahte hain to hamare discussion board “Just Poocho” mein zaroor shamil ho! https://lovematters.in/en/forum
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