FAQs – Sex and Internet

My boyfriend watches porn on the internet. I’m not happy about it. What should I do?

Tell him you don’t like it and why not. Does it make you feel insecure and jealous? Do you think there’s something wrong with him? Or do you object to the way pornography treats women? Try to be as honest as possible. Listen to his reaction. What does porn mean to him? Perhaps it’s never occurred to him that it makes you unhappy. Decide on a solution you can both live with.

My boyfriend wants me to masturbate in front of the webcam. I don’t want to. What if he ends it?

Don’t do it if you don’t feel happy about it. You decide what you do in front of the webcam. It’s never good if you’re forced to do something sexual in a relationship. Talk about it to your boyfriend and explain why you don’t want to do it. If it matters so much to him, then he obviously doesn’t care about you.

When we chat online my girlfriend promises things she won’t do in reality. What should I do?

Many people feel much freer when they chat on the internet. They say things they wouldn’t say face to face. Tell your girlfriend you feel disappointed if she doesn’t keep the promises she makes online. Give her time to find out what she is really prepared to do. There’s no point getting angry – it will only scare her off.

I’ve been flirting with a boy online, but now he won’t stop. I don’t want to hurt his feelings, but I’ve had enough of it.

Tell him the bad news. No one likes to be rejected, but the good news is that everyone gets over it. Say it in a friendly way. If he takes it well, you might become friends. If he keeps on hassling you, block him.

I took my clothes off for my boyfriend on the webcam, but now I regret it.

Tell him you won’t do it again. Say you didn’t like it, and you’d rather do something else. If he cares about you, he’ll respect your wishes, even if he thinks it’s a shame. If he finishes with you, he obviously isn’t really interested in you as a person.

There’s a photo of me naked on the internet. I’m so embarrassed I don’t dare tell anyone about it.

Try and have the photo removed. Send a request to the makers of the website. If you’re under 18, the picture is child pornography and it’s illegal for it to be on the internet. Depending on where you live, if you feel secure about it, you could report it to the police. Again depending on the country you live in, they might help you have it removed, even if you don’t want to press charges.