Free energy! Rocket dildo! Vaginal FaceTime!
“With an estimated 41 million people visiting it every day, Pornhub figured it might be time to channel all that furious fapping into something more useful than brief, boredom-relieving ecstasy,” according to ‘Pornhub turns masturbation into energy in bid to save the planet’. This ‘wankband’ channels wrist motion to power your smartphone or computer. The tree-hugging, trunk-tugging porn site also promised to plant a tree for every 100 of their videos watched.
“When Stephanie Berman and her wife decided they wanted to start a family, they had two options: spend thousands of dollars at a doctor’s office for artificial insemination, or try a do-it-yourself method at home. They opted for the latter,” according to ‘Ejaculating dildo allows lesbian couples to conceive at home’.
One can only wonder if the couple also used another recent innovation to make sure the donor sperm shot up far enough: ‘This “sex selfie stick” lets you FaceTime with your vagina (NSFW)’
What tech tells us about sex
Our use of technology can also give us fresh insights into our sex lives. In the fascinating and hilarious ‘Searching for sex’, a data analyst digs deep into Google searches to expose our shared insecurities.
Humans lie a lot. We don’t nearly have as much sex as we like to suggest. For example, “sexless marriage” is searched for eight times more than “loveless marriage”.
Men worry about their penis size 170 times more than women worry about their men’s penis size – and 40 % of these women worry about it being too big and causing “pain”.
How Americans perceive butt size has changed – across both race and gender. Before 2004, the majority of related searches made by women were how to make their butts smaller. Now for every five searches for breast implants, one is a search for butt implants.
“Or consider the most common search about a girlfriend’s breasts: ‘I love my girlfriend’s boobs.’ It is not clear what men are hoping to find from Google when making this search.”
The author concludes: “This data makes me feel less lonely. In my previous studies of Google data, I had found the viciousness that humans often hide. But this time around, I have seen our hidden insecurities. Men and women are united in this insecurity and confusion. […] Alone, at their computers, with no incentive to lie, partners reveal themselves to be fairly non-superficial and forgiving. In fact, we are all so busy judging our own bodies that there is little energy left over to judge other people’s.”
“Maybe if we worried less about sex, we’d have more of it.”
An old-school super orgasm
Why is mass media so obsessed with cutting-edge sex tech when there’s so much old-fashioned expertise to be rediscovered?
“Hailed as the ultimate sexercise, pompoir allows women to drive the sexual experience without thrusting or rocking,” according to ‘The ancient (and largely forgotten) secret to super-orgasms’.
“The art of pompoir involves extensive training and control of the vaginal and pubococcygeus (PC) muscles. It’s known as ‘kabazza’ in the Arabic language, and is also referred to as the ‘Singapore Kiss’. The practice is unique in the way it allows females to drive the sexual experience and stations men in an entirely passive position.”
Pompoir is said to date back more than 3,000 years to India, before being exported and embraced by the likes of Greek courtesans and Japanese geishas.
It takes a lot of time and effort to master pompoir’s many tricks: “the pull ability”, “the lock ability”, “the gripping ability”, “the pulse ability”, “the squeeze ability”, “the twist ability” and, finally, “the extrude ability”.
Perhaps someone can up with an app to help speed up the learning process.
Sex. Are you old school or new school? Or do you prefer to surf the wave in between? Leave a comment below or join the discussion on Facebook.