Why People Cheat in Relationships
© Love Matters | Rita Lino

Have you been cheated?

Cheating means breaking rules you have agreed on in a committed relationship. Usually cheating refers to sexual infidelity or adultery. If you are making out or having sex with someone outside of your committed relationship, it means you’re cheating on your partner.

Cheating doesn’t always have to be sexual. Sometimes cheating is on an emotional level. When someone shares intimate thoughts with a person who’s not his or her partner, it’s called emotional cheating.

 

Cheating of any form can cause a lot of sorrow in relationships and can even lead to a break-up or divorce. Find out more about cheating in our Cheating: top five facts.

Why do people cheat?

There are many reasons why people cheat on their partners. You might cheat if you don’t love your partner any more, if sex isn’t satisfying, if your partner has cheated on you in the past, if you feel neglected or under-appreciated, or if you feel the urge to settle previous scores.

Lying to your partner about your affairs can be a stop-gap arrangement but it’s very likely that sooner or later your partner will discover the truth. If you feel guilty about having cheated and want to continue having a strong relationship with your partner, confession might be an option. You could also keep quiet about what happened and stay committed to your relationship. The lack of honesty could put a strain on your relationship though.

On the other hand if you have cheated and want to end it with your partner, again there are two options – to confess about your behaviour and say goodbye or to hide your infidelity and say you want to break up for other reasons.

Is your partner cheating on you?

If you know your partner well and have had a close, long term relationship, you can often tell when something’s not right. You might notice that they’ve begun spending a lot more time at work, they have less time for you and your family, start taking calls in private and seem less committed to doing things with you. They have begun lying, paying attention to their looks, appear confused and detached. When you ask them if there’s something wrong, they shrug off your question.

 

Finding out that your partner’s been cheating on you can be a traumatic experience. It could breach all trust between the two of you and could even lead to a break-up, separation or divorce. You might spend days, weeks and months wondering what you did to be at the receiving end of this behaviour. Give yourself the benefit of doubt and take some time to calm down and think with your head over your shoulders.

Whether you want to continue the relationship depends on a number of factors. Is your partner willing to go on? If they are, what will it take for them to regain your trust? Will your trust in them ever be restored? What are the ways to rebuild your relationship? You may decide what the right path for you is after you’ve given these questions enough thought.

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